Friday, August 30, 2013
Wyoming is a beautiful state full of fresh air and cool mountains and home to some of the most vile people who ever drew a breath of that fresh air. That, of course, being the Cheney family and anybody who tourists to Jackson Hole. Nah ,that may be a cheap shot at Wyoming because, after all, the Cheneys are really residents of about everywhere else on earth except Wyoming as are the Jackson Hole tourists.
Dick Cheney, born in Lincoln, Nebraska until even THEY ran the heartless prick out of the state and into Wyoming where he was indoctrinated into the Republican state of mind. As soon as this leech could, he left Wyoming and went to Washington DC where he started his career as a bully, a drunkard and a torture enthusiast while carefully avoiding going back to Wyoming, unless he could use the good folk for his own advancement. He did use them and they let him when he ran for that empty state's only Congressional seat and won over and over again. Like they do in Iraq and Russia. Cheney got bored having to go back to Wyoming and putting up with grown men in cowboy hats every now and then and became Secretary of Defense under President George H W Bush, the one who was really bad but nowhere near as bad as his stupid son so we don't think he was that bad. While there, Cheney invaded Panama, and bombed the shit out of Iraq. From there he led defense thieves Haliburton to prominence and moved to Texas ,where he shot a guy who got his face in the way of Cheney's shotgun. While living in Texas, The Dick drove a Texas car, paid Texas taxes and assuredly hollered "hot damn" every now and then. When the stupid Bush was ordered to pick Cheney as his Veep, Cheney ran back to Wyoming and said shit you people are sure hard to find. They call these types "carpetbaggers". Other well know carpetbaggers include Ted Cruz, Chuck Hagel, and Hillary Clinton (yes I can be an equal opportunity basher), however, they have hearts. Proven. Though Cruz's is black.
The spawn of the heartless Dick ,one Liz Cheney, has moved back to Wyoming to attempt to show the dopey folks who live there just how Wyoming-eeeee she is and become their new United States Senator. Though she's lived in Virginia for years, ahhhhhhhh who'd notice? Certainly not a bunch of rubes like Wyoming folk. They'd welcome Liz Cheney back as one of their own even though she was born in that liberal hellhole of Madison, Wisconsin, went to college in that pot smoking Colorado and that Obama loving Chicago and , wait a flippin minute here, has never lived in Wyoming??? What the fuck, Wyoming? You aren't falling for this bullshit are ya?
Wyoming currently has a Republican Senator who will cruise to victory in 2014 against any jeans wearing lamb the Democrats put up. But Liz Cheney has an ego. And a mean streak a mile wide. Wyoming's current Senator is some nobody named Mike Enzi, a guy so conservative he actually still wants a constitutional amendment to ban flag burning. But to Liz Cheney, that's not good enough. Liz Cheney looks like that cigarette smoking scotch guzzling barfly with a Noo Yawk accent who would actually ask you to step outside so she could kick your ass for actually challenging her stupid ass views. Wyoming? Please!
But Liz Cheney has gone off the Cheney Nutty Reservation by now claiming she doesnt want the gays to be able to get married. Trouble is her sister, Mary Cheney, is all gay married and shit and even the heartless prick of a father they ahare has has no problem with it. So Liz Cheney, who I think still has a beating heart, thinks her own sister is not good enough to be married. Wow, that's harsh. Even Dick Cheney is pushing his heart beating machine around and shaking his head at his utter failure as a father. You see, he did raise a good Republican conservative nutjob. But he also now knows he raised a complete asshole.
Good job, Dick!