Sunday, February 27, 2011

I'm A Huffin' And I'm A Puffin' !

Yeah we got some big old buildings here in Omaha. That one (the First National Bank Tower) is a whole 40 stories high and the Steve King voters from across the river in Iowa like to come over and look up at it thinking Jesus himself may be sittin' up there sometime.

Anyway, Max's Dad climbed the steps of that damn thing in 12:02 Saturday morning. So what you say? Well a year ago Max's Dad was a fat, slow, immovable white guy and couldn't have ridden the elevator to the top without stopping on 20 for a breather. Now, Max's Dad is an overweight, slow, movable white guy who can climb 864 steps or whatever the ungodly number is without dropping dead.

When you get to the top, 633 feet up towards heaven, you can look down and flip the Steve King voters off. That's what Jesus would do. Onward!

Friday, February 25, 2011

Cairo, Tripoli, Madison?

Ever since I was a little kid in Catholic School and saw how hard my parents worked, how smart they were, and how they never seemed to quite get to where they wanted to be, I listened to the American Dream propaganda and thought it was a giant load of crap. And of course, it IS a load of crap. And it gets stinkier by the day.

All over the country, scared, fearful, ignorant people are freaking out and looking for somebody to blame for their woes. Oh, it can't be the fact the "american dream" is bollocks, it has to be somebody's fault that I'm still driving the 10 year old car and haven't had a raise in 5 years. It can't be Wall Street's fault. Those white guys and gals in $5000 suits are too big to blame. The Republicans (and some Democrats) in Congress who suck the Wall Street ass are not to blame. They're looking out for me. By giving those Wall Street folks more and more money, they might let me have some of it and give me a better job (keep dreaming there bub unless you are willing to move to China). No it has to be the Mexicans, no no the gays, no no I got it, it's unions. Unions! That's who to blame. Government leeches taking my tax money and doing nothing in return but giving me a hard time at the DMV. Greedy teachers teaching my kids all that liberal claptrap like math and english and science and reading. That's the boogie man of the hour, the union employees.

Now of course it's 100% bullshit that the unions have caused the entire budget shortfall in Wisconsin or anywhere else for that matter. It's convenience and a Republican opportunity to bust unions and further their agenda of turning the United States into a plutocracy. The amazing part is that a growing number of dolts are falling for it. Look at the 2010 election. Teabagger freaks have taken control because many of us normal people (and by that I mean those of us who don't need a government paid for scooter to haul our fat asses around in) didn't vote. When you don't vote, you lose. And these nuts take over. The nuts are funded by some very wealthy benefactors (Koch anyone?) whose mission is to destroy the middle class and grab all the money for themselves. Their minions, the teabaggers, can be called Koch whores from now on. Scott Walker, the deer in the headlights Governor of Cheeseland, is a Koch whore, proven by his falling for a prank phone call from one of the "Koch" Bros.

I am not going to get into specifics on budget deficits here. But public unions are not to blame. Oh, they're not blameless, but they are not the horrible evil the Republicans are brainwashing the Koch whores to believe. Christ, Texas doesn't even have any government unions, doesn't allow collective bargaining and they have a budget shortfall that would choke a $60 million Texas high school football stadium booster. So stop with the garbage about unions being Freddie Krueger. The union pension funds, while generous as hell, were raped just like you and me by those pricks on Wall Street. Pure and simple.

So stop looking down on your neighbor as the cause of all your troubles. Start looking up at the real problem. Those financial rapists and their blowhard talkers on the radio. You'd be surprised at how easy it is to blame the real culprits. And if the Middle East is any indication, how easy it would be to get rid of them.

Sunday, February 13, 2011

2016 Anyone?

Congratulations to President Barack Obama for winning the 2012 presidential election.

The wingnuts have spoken. I haven't seen a duller list of kooks since I last looked at the roster of the Nebraska legislature sans Ernie Chambers.

Sunday, February 6, 2011


Which one of these idiots do I root for? One hails from a city so frozen over they wear cheese on their head to keep their 70 IQ's intact and they actually believe they own their team.

The other hails from a city of meathead ex-steel workers who think The Deer Hunter portrays them in a positive way. Fat, drunk and stupid with a groping QB for a hero.

Hmmm...whom to root for? Well, at least the Packers aren't Rush Limbaugh's favorite team.