Friday, December 25, 2015

Merry Christmas!


Merry Christmas everyone. But beware, while you're drinking, evil is still plotting. Trump, Daesh, Trump, Cruz, Trump, NRA, Trump, yeah that's about it .

Happy Holidays.....oops.

Tuesday, December 22, 2015

The Opposition!

Q38 Would you support or oppose bombing
Agrabah?
Support bombing Agrabah 30% ..............................
Oppose bombing Agrabah 13% ..............................
Not sure 57%

That's what we are dealing with.....30% of Republicans want to bomb a fictional country. But hey, at least 13% don't want to bomb a fictional country.

Do you believe that thousands of Arabs in New
Jersey cheered when the World Trade Center
collapsed on 9/11 or not?
36%
Believe thousands of Arabs in New Jersey
cheered when the World Trade Center
collapsed on 9/11............................................
35%
Do not believe thousands of Arabs in New
Jersey cheered when the World Trade Center
collapsed on 9/11............................................
Not sure 29%

Hey where's the question if the 9/11 terrorists arrived via magic carpet?

You want your country back? Really?

Monday, December 14, 2015

North Carolina The Smart Carolina?


The desire to go backwards is getting so demanding and so mainstream, at least in many parts of Trumpistan, it's a wonder that modern day Orson Welles hasn't made America piss its pants and insist it's not Isis threatening Amurca but the calendar and science itself with its crazy ideas about gravity and shit. Oh sorry, there is one. And his hair is perfect.

Down in some North Carolina (that's the smart Carolina) hamlet called Woodland (creative I must say) some of those hippies came in and tried to get a permit to put up a solar panel farm and provide electricity to the whole county and make the county all environmentally happy and probably high as a kite from all the solar panel 2nd hand solar fumes.

Solar farms? Huh? With all them solar panels and stuff that Saint Ronnie Reagan took off the White House roof when he was king and before he ascended into heaven? THOSE kind of solar panels? Migawd, what would the ghost of Reagan say?

Retired (thank gawd) science teacher Jean Mann stood trembling in front if the town council ,the best and the brightest of Woodland I am sure, and used he science teacher credentials to claim that solar energy causes cancer and dadgummit theres nuthin you can say to convince her otherwise. There's a high degree of cancer deaths in that county that Mrs.Mann blames on solar panels which are the obvious cause, and then she had to step outside for a smoke with the other cancer prone solar panel victims. Goldarnit, she taught science for 35 years and if you bring in solar panels, everything will turn brown cuz that photosynthesis deal will not kick in cu the solar panels are like a giant Hoover sucking the sun up so nobody else can get any sunlight. The town will be dark 24/7 I guess. It's North Carolina science. Undeniable cuz its science. Good science, not that pussy science that travels into space and says the earth is changing its climate and that humans evolved from monkeys and cures diseases. No, leave that hoax of libtard science to the libtards trying to destroy America.

Jean's husband, Bobby Mann, who completes the Mann Institute of Science faculty, got up and expressed his scientifically based fears that no business ,other than those commie solar panel freaks, will come to Woodland since all the sunlight is getting sucked up by the panels from hell. And if business doesn't come to Woodland, all the young people will leave and then what? No more high school football? Oh my, it's just a nightmare waiting to happen, thanks to those damned hippies and their solar energy scam.

By the way, the town council climbed under the desks and voted 3-1 to stop progress. Because that's America 2015. Where the dumb is celebrated and the smart is derided. Newly sworn in Councilman, Cecil Harkey (I am making none of this up) voted oh come onnnnnn people and no to the petition to stop solar panels. His recall is imminent I am sure.

Two things.

1) I wish I could tell you this county in North Carolina voted for McCain and Romney in overwhelming numbers. But I can't. Cuz it would be untrue. Obama won this town in 2008 and even bigger in 2012. The county is represented in Congress by a Democrat. The dumb has become so common it's even infiltrated us. See Anti-Vaxxers. We need help, the cancer (and not the solar panel kind) is spreading.

2) No Mr.Mann, the young people won't move cuz of the solar farms, they will move cuz of people like you. Unlike the 50 year residents of towns like this, they want change. They want to see the things they see on the cable TV and the internet. Hangin out at the diner and bitching about this and that doesn't cut it. Bye bye Woodland.

Solar energy does not cause cancer, unless you lay around in it all day so you can look cool. Solar energy cause independence from shithole parts of the world we just can't get away from. And it costs the Koch Brothers money. It costs BP and Exxon and the rest of these life sucking oil companies money. And it's rubes like the Mann's of Woodland North Carolina that empower these assholes.

What did Lenin say? Well it wasn't a phrase about "useful idiots" cuz he never said that. But nonetheless, being a useful idiot is worse than just being an idiot. Most idiots are useless. See Carly Fiorina rally. But useful idiots are dangerous. See Trump rally.

Sunday, December 13, 2015

Creed!


Ok fine, I fell for it again.

Rocky V was so fucking horrible back in 1990 that it forever tarnished that vaunted series of popcorn boxing movies you couldn't avoid from 1976 onward. But then Sylvester Stallone, probably guilt ridden over the Rocky legacy, directed himself in 2006 in Rocky Balboa and put a nice finishing touch on the series. And he walked away with it intact again. Great.

If you are over 50 you remember the first Rocky on a big screen. Man, was that a movie! The music, the story, the guy, the background characters, the whole damn thing made you want to run out into the streets and shadow box until you realized how out of shape you were. Rocky won Oscar, Stallone was a star, and Bill Conte could write music that actually made you want to work out. Wow.

Then came Rocky 2 which had to be made. Stallone was now a muscle bound meathead. Lovable but still he had become his own real life self. Rocky 2 was ok, not great but ok. Then Rocky 3 came along. And it was better, much better than Rocky 2 because its villain was actually a villain, not the lovable Apollo Creed, but Mister T in all his glory. And they killed Mickey. Rocky 4 featured another great villain, a steroid pumped robot Russian who actually killed Apollo Creed.

Then came Rocky 5. Ugh!

But a fresh set of eyes in a 29 year old director named Ryan Coogler (Fruitvale Station) saw a series that needed to continue and the result is Creed. Thanks a lot, Ryan Coogler because this series is back and as good as ever.

Creed features two actors you cannot help but love, Michael B Jordan as Apollo Creed's insecure love child, and of course, Stallone as a broken down Rocky just living out his life until he can reunite in the after life with Adrian and Paulie.

The story is basically Rocky rebooted with Stallone playing the Burgess Meredith part (women weaken legs) and Jordan playing Rocky. Inexperienced, angry and looking to knock over the best fighter on earth, Creed moves up the ladder under a different name. Then when he beats a fighter of note, yep, its all over the media who he really is.

You can guess the rest. And it's thrilling. Updated and freshened up by Coogler, this series could go on for years if the players want it to. Some part of me hopes it does, yet some part of me worries about a Creed 5.

And now a bit about Stallone. He aint a great actor, lets face it. But at age 69, he knows who he is. He's Rocky Balboa. And dammit he is fantastic in this movie. He moves like a 69 year old ex fighter. He worries about his own mortality like a 69 year old man. He revels in his de facto son's success. He bleeds for Creed's failures. If Sylvester Stallone is not nominated for an Oscar for this movie, I will be shocked. And if he wins, I would be happy for him. He is that good.

Go see it. It's worth it.

Saturday, December 12, 2015

Celebrity FlimFlammer!


I swear I thought he'd be gone by now. He'd be hosting that mildly amusing reality show again, blaming the mainstream everything for his demise, being the martyr, saying how he would have won the presidency easy, all 50 states, going back to just being a dick to poor people.
But he's still here/. And he's fucking winning!

I don't care for Republican politics. It's selfish, mean spirited, tin eared, very white, and geared to protecting the powerful while conning the lessers with side dishes like religion and guns and abortion and other nonsensical bullshit the powers that be don't really give a shit about. But it was always that inner, hidden, quiet white supremacy wing that really bugged me. The ones that support the police and the military regardless of who they murder kill in the line of duty. The ones who decry "welfare" and "foreign aid" and "food stamps" while grabbing as much free shit as they can. The ones who want to lock em up and throw away the key on every dark skinned hoodie wearing mugshot they see on their local scary news while ignoring the thieves in suits and ties running the economy from the computer screens of Wall Street. One for you, 5 for me, one for you, five for me oh fuck you all 6 for me. Those people were always what 10%, 20% of Republican voters? They never got what they wanted. Their candidates could win Iowa and some dumbass gerrymandered congressional district somewhere in rural America. But they never actually had any power. The right wing talk radio would fuel them up and then, after they lost, they'd go back to what they do best. Bitching and moaning and kicking down the barn doors because then they don't have to do a damn thing.

But it was only what 20%, 25% ok maybe 30%.

Chrissakes I gave them too much credit. The Republicans that is. I had no idea these kooks were out there in such great numbers. These people who hear something from Uncle Bill who heard it from some guy at the tavern who heard it on TV. No I swear. It's true and goddamit nobody can convince me otherwise not even with your facts and video proof. Those are all doctored......No no Obama is a Muslim, he was born in Kenya I heard it on TV and saw it on the internet. You're all liars lah lah lah lah stop lying liberal media.

That reality TV star is winning. This guy, this straw haired Harold Hill, has no idea what he's doing. The ego maniacal rantings of a guy who took the task of running for President as a lark and a self promoting mission, suddenly has a big lead and like the dog who caught the car, he doesn't know what the fuck to do next. So he doubles down on everything. Lies about Muslims, more lies about Muslims, lies about Mexicans, lies about blacks, lies about women, lies about the gays. All designed to get him the fuck out of the race. But it doesn't work. The bigot factor, the racist factor, the factor that Max's Dad always believed was so minuscule it didn't matter is growing. WTF is going on?

The country elected a black guy in 2008 because well, the demographics were there, the other side had an old man and a crazy woman running and Obama was in the right place at the right time. And then he won again in 2012. Bigger. Again, the demographics were there and the other side ran a plutocrat and Eddie Munster.

And the country lost its fucking mind. The old white people threw a fucking temper tantrum in 2010 and because in off year elections the demographics revert back to America 1955 and sent these Tea Party whackdoodles into office where they went on and on about debt and their children and grandchildren's future when anybody with a room temperature IQ knew it was all about them. About their panicky thoughts that the blacks and the mexicans and the queers and the loudmouthed ladies were taking over. Their deep down racism and sexism and homophobia blew the tops off their heads. Now its game on.

The reality show guy is their man. He "tells it like it is". And the reality show guy just keeps telling it like it is. To them. The ones so goddamned ignorant and clueless, they believe whatever they hear on Rush or Levin or see on Fox News or read on Breitbart. And anybody who tells em different lies and covers up the "truth".

I used to believe very strongly in "Godwin's Law". Ya know, the one that says eventually any political argument will end up with a Nazi comparison and whoever throws the Hitler card out first loses? I believed that a Hitler or Nazi comparison was used to justify virtually every stupid fucking murderous war this nation embarks on. So I didn't use it.

But for gawdsakes, after watching the Yer Fired guy whip those South Carolina rednecks into a Islam hating frenzy and seeing a CNN panel of 29 Trump "supporters" say things about the sitting President like Fred Lanzillo, a 59 year old (sigh) Marine did:

"When you bend down to the Saudis, take your shoes off, put your hand on a Koran and then the Bible when you're sworn in?" He took his flag pin off. I'm a Marine and former deputy sheriff. He took that off, he was in the toilet to me. I would not only not piss on him if he was on fire—I'd throw gas on him."

I mean after 26 of the 29 raised their hands to believe a lie that Obama is actually a Muslim and nobody can tell em any different, what else is there to say?

Sieg He..........nah not ready quite yet.......

Monday, December 7, 2015

Fox Goes Dirty!


Holy smokes. What a racket. This country elected a black dude to the Presidency in 2008 and this nation went fucking bonkers. It's like when the shittiest President ever until 2000 Reagan opened the asylums back in the 80's and let the inmates out. There was no Fox News for the whack jobs to run to back then they they all became homeless and therefore white people don't have to care any longer. But now, holy tin foil, Batman, Fox News has em all. Come on in, spout off your bullshit and there's millions of dumb old white people who will tip a cosmopolitan to ya right before switching back to Castle.

Lt. Colonel Ralph Peters, who regularly goes on Fox and rolls his eyes and jabbers on about Obummer while maintaining his credibility by writing shitty war novels where real Americans kill everybody and let Gawd sort em out. Peters, who retired years ago and found himself lonely and bored and just itching to kill people again until those damn Democrats won and all that peace shit started. Peters, who never fired a gun at anything except his own foot, is one of those wonks who still thinks that Lenin will rise from his crypt and then he can be happy that the Cold War iso n again. Guys like Peters, The General Jack D Ripper of Fox News, like to holler and scream and talk like Bill O'Reilly wants to talk, appealing to the armchair tough guy who thinks bombing the shit out of everybody works.

Peters went overboard by calling the President of the United States a "total pussy" today on the Fox Business Channel, watched by dozens of cable viewers who can't get the remote to work. On that English creep Stuart Varney's show, Peters went nuts and even made that limey blowhard tell him to watch his mouth. Pussy is not an acceptable term on Fox. Commie, date rapist, and anything Trump says is pure gold, but pussy? Hey watch it, office sitting former policy guy who never did anything remotely dangerous, Colonel Peters. Or should I say, Colonel Dick, Colonel Schlong, Colonel Putz, Colonel Cock, I mean Colonel Klink. By the way Colonel Prick, you're dissssssssssmissed.

Earlier in the day some babe named Stacey Dash decided to turn Fox Monday into quite the potty mouth network of choice for all old loudmouths who think the elderly cussing is never not funny. Dash is an actress turned commentator? Yeah I have no idea either. But she decided to blurt out, I'm sure via cue cards, that the President didn't give a "shit" about terrorism. You know he doesn't care because all that drone killing and Osama killing is just a smoke screen for the real mission. To install ISIS into power so that Fox News viewers can achieve orgasmic pleasure by screeching "We told ya so" right before they pulled out the Jeanine Pirro love doll.

Dash, who cluttered up an appropriately named film called "Clueless" back in the 90's, found out very quickly after Obama's election that being a failed actress with the ability to read cue cards AND being half black could get her far by simply becoming one of the "good ones' that the Fox dinosaurs love to watch. Oh she's so purty, for one of them, and she makes sense being all up in Obama's face. See, we arent racists, we like that half colored girl a whole lot, as long as she doesn't move next door.

Yep, it's Dash and Peters. Cussing away, but good cussing cuz its against Nobummer on that there Fox Network.

Go back to writing books, Colonel Klink. And go back to making relevant movies like "Lap Dance" and "Lethal Eviction", Stacey Dash.

Saturday, December 5, 2015

Republican Voter Guide!


There are so many of these putz's running for the right to lose to Hillary it really is amazing the egomania involved here. And I'm not only talking about that one schlep who can't keep his mouth or his twitter shut, it's all of them. Seemingly convinced that they and they alone can save America from the damage done by the Kenyan Muslim Socialist Gay man with the transgender wife, this bunch of complete looooooooooozers continues on and makes me wonder, who in the fuck supports these assholes?

Bush voters--- thee are the establishment types. Hey it's his turn. Really? Ok I guess it is since the Bush's are apparently related to the royal family and Jeb! is next in line to further wreck the word. Like his daddy started and his brother finished. Bush voters are the kind of people who idolize GHW Bush cuz he's old and jumps out of planes and actually touched Saint Ronnie. And are still defending GW Bush cuz if you don't you have to admit Nobummer made things better and that's not an option. Bush voters are people who follow the rules to a tee and still call young people "hippies".

Carson voters-- these are the people who think they are smarter than your average Republican voter, not a high bar. They support the Crazy Doctor because he's a brain surgeon, he's black, and he has zero chance. This way, they can claim that after they tell some racist Obummer joke or forward Uncle Jerry's racist e mail, they can say heyyyy look at the n bumper of my Lexus, t has a Carson sticker. These people will eventually move on and looking at polls, have already done so.

Christie voters---- these are the folks who want a guy who tells it like it is, but isn't some reality show clown. They like Christie getting into bum fights with teachers and guys on a boardwalk because hey that's what they do. These people love Christie for being a tough guy and being a loud mouthed buffoon, like them. They just know he's Tony Soprano and will choke a guy like Putin to death in live TV and then say heyyyyyyy what'd I do heahhhhh?

Cruz voters-- these people are the scary ones. Just imagine they are all packing heat and just itching to shoot you. Unless of course they are at a Cruz rally where guns aren't allowed. George Zimmerman is their hero and they can't stand the fact that Nobama was born in a foreign country, never went to college and is a secret Mooslim agent groomed since 1961 by the Islamic brainwashers to take down 'Merica. The fact Cruz was born in Canada doesn't matter cuz Canada is white.

Fiorina voters-- Carly Fiorina ran a corporation, all bow to the corporation. The fact she ran it into the ground is irrelevant. This alone makes her more qualified than Hillary. She's a woman. She lies a lot. She IS Hillary, but she lies about good stuff, like Planned Parenthood. Fiorina voter used to go to private school, where a ruler carrying fascist dean used to come walking down the hall slamming the individualists around and patting little Carly on the head. Fiorina voter pretty much is a fascist longing to put their foot down on the creative weirdos.

Gilmore voters--- whoever Gilmore is, it's him

Graham voters-- Graham voters? Come on now. They will never come out of their closets to vote anyway so who cares?

Huckabee voters-- these snake handler idiots want to live in a theocracy where Jesus rules and funny old Mike Hucakabee makes wise cracks right before he pound the final nail into all the infidels hands. Mike Huckabee voters are Mike Huckabee before he lost weight. They are still fat, and especially between the ears, like he still is. Huckabee voters are the types who offer "thoughts and prayers" and are dumb enough to think thats all they have to do.

Jindal voters---even they hate his guts now

Kasich voters--shhhhhhh, this guy is the only one who could win. Not likely, but he could. Kasich voters know this. They know that Kasich is in reality a rock ribbed neanderthal but he covers it up well. He's the Republican stealth candidate, the one who talks about compassion and shit he really doesn't buy into, and Kasich voter does too. yeah they perceive themselves as all compassionate for the underprivileged,if they weren't all lazy bums and mooches that is. Kasich voter will end up being a Bush voter, fuck all those poor assholes.

Pataki voters-- these people need to just admit they will vote for Hillary.

Paul voters--generally young and stupid. Paul Ryan types. They have posters on their dorm walls of Ayn Rand and Ron Paul and think Rand Paul is like Ron and Ayn had a baby. 95% of them will eventually evolve into a typical right wing prick, which technically they've already done, but they like to smoke dope still.

Perry voter--oops, he's gone back to n*****head ranch. Y'all.

Rubio voter--these are the desperate types who know that the current front runner is a fucking nightmare and are busy seeking anything that could possibly even win 10 states. Rubio voters think his story is inspiring ,unlike that Obummer's story. Of course Rubio's "story" is 100% caca but who cares. Rubio voter is so hungry to support anybody other than that New York dick, they will jump on any bandwagon Fox News tell them to. Rubio voter also used to be Bush voter, Carson voter and Fiorina voter. And who knows, may become one again.

Santorum voter-- see Huckabee voter. Only just a bit smarter. Snake handling? No way. They stick to the body and blood myth.

Trump voter-- Wow, there is so much dumb to go aruond here it's hard to pinpoint. Trump voter is just plain stupid. They couldn't care less if their man makes fun of the disabled, kicks Hispanics around, tells black women to "do a routine", thrusts his crotch at them, calls them stupid, lies and refuses to take it back even after being proven wrong. Trump voters are bullies who see themselves up om that stage. Their bullying days are long behind them, but Trump makes them long for the day they beat up the homo, or kick the mexican in the ass or use the N bomb without fear of being called out on it. Fuck this diversity shit! America will be white great again under the Donald. Trump voter is also a big fan of Ted Nugent cuz going to a Trump rally is like going to a Nugent show, or a Nuremberg rally.

Once Trump is gone, and he will be either through his own volition or the Republican hierarchy fixing the game, who knows what Republican voter will be stuck with.

But it doesn't matter, Republican voter. The demographic isn't there any longer. You lost. America will never be white great again. And for Republican voter that is a win. They just love to piss and moan and have not a clue how to fix anything, other than Congressional elections.

Wednesday, December 2, 2015

Thoughts And Prayers! LOL!


Yeah when even the New York Daily News thinks these Republican pricks are wasting their time with their empty prayers and thoughts, they are.

Besides, either God hates their guts (which if he exists, he does) or they aren't really praying (which they aren't) and their only thoughts are of fund raising off the daily mass murder spree that is America 2015!

I'm going to go puke now.

Sunday, November 29, 2015

Spotlight on Room!


Do yourself a favor and go see Spotlight in your local movie theater as soon as possible. In the tradition of All The President's Men,this is a journalism movie. Now maybe the youth have no idea what journalism is because quite frankly it doesn't exist any longer, but by seeing this movie, they will understand what used to happen to bad people once the newspapers got a hold of your skullduggery. Spotlight tells the story of a special team of Boston Globe (thats a newspaper kids) who tackle the story of the Boston Archdiocese covering up pedophilia, paying off victims of the abuse, oh hell call it what it was, racketeering.

Strong performances from Michael Keaton, Mark Ruffalo, Rachel McAdams, John Slattery, Stanley Tucci, Brian D'Arcy James and great subtle performance from Liev Schreiber fuel this thriller. Yeah it's a thriller. Will they get the story? Will the church destroy them? Will Mark Ruffalo's rage make him turn green?

I used to work in newspaper rooms 100 years ago. I was of the generation of Woodward and Bernstein who thought we'd change the world and slay all the evil. Man we were wrong. Watergate is nothing compared to the open buying of these creeps in DC nowadays. Nowadays "journalism" is some TMZ busybody telling you so and so is screwing so and so and people actually giving a shit. But not that long ago, journalism was noble. It got bad guys. It made bad guys tremble. Now, we celebrate these bad apples.

Spotlight is a noble film. Period. I miss that.

Room is a movie that makes you glad to be a movie lover. Room is a tough watch for an hour or so. A story of a young woman kidnapped and held captive in a garden shed, the Room, who has a young son thanks to her rapist kidnapper.Their life in the room is a young woman making the best of it. Teaching her young son the ways of the world, lying of course, that outside is outer space and the room is perfectly normal. Brie Larson is wonderful as this young mother trying to keep her son, Jack, from the truth. Until the opportunity to escape comes along and Jack is forced to learn the truth, much to his dismay.

The final hour of this movie is Ma and Jack trying to assimilate to a world one had forgotten and the other has never known. Joan Allen as Ma's mother is a needed glue to keep this movie intact and she is brilliant as usual.

But I gotta tell ya. This little boy, played by an unknown child actor named Jacob Tremblay is one of the most brilliant performances I have ever seen. Not for a kid, but for anyone. There are certain performances by unknown to me actors and actresses in movies in history I can never get over. I remember Robert Redford in Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. I remember Meryl Streep in Julia. I recall seeing this guy named Robert DeNiro in Godfather 2. Benicio Del Toro in Traffic. Debra Winger in Urban Cowboy (I didnt say they were all good movies). Edward Norton in Primal Fear. Leonardo DiCaprio in Gilbert Grape. And now Jacob Tremblay in Room. This kid is THAT good. There isnt a false moment in his performance. He's 5 years old. And he acts 5 years old. Brilliantly.

Go see Room. Go see Spotlight. The more money these types of movies make, the more of them they will greenlight.

Saturday, November 28, 2015

Thanks, Obama!


There ya go. I've put some pictures up there in order of their scariness so as not to ruin Hung Over Saturday or whatever it's called.

Which one scares you the most? And by "you" I mean people who have no idea who any of those people are.

Well the top one is of doughy Chicago police officer Dick Jerry Jason Van Dyke. Officer Jason was minding his own business one night protecting white Chicago from Obama's Chicago when he came upon a 17 year old kid walking around with a knife. Now LaQuan McDonald, a fellow Irishman no doubt, decided to walk away from Officer Van Dyke and therefore got shot about 16 times proving the Fox News theory that if you turn your back on a cop you deserve to be shot and shot and shot and repeat. But look at that guy, Van Dyke. He looks so nice and friendly. You'd love him to live next door where you can drink the beer and grill up the meat and complain about how discriminated against you are in Obama's Chicago. Cmon, he aint scary.

The second picture is of one Robert Lewis Dear. Yeah he looks nuts. Like all white gunmen. Ya see all white mass murderers are mentally ill, not politically or religiously motivated like all those other types. Mister Dear walked into a Planned Parenthood clinic in Colorado Springs, a bastion of right wing nuttery, and personally saved 6,000 babies from being killed on that Planned Parenthood abortion assembly line. So for that, he is to be celebrated by fellow mentally ill white people. A cop was murdered, along with two civilians, but hey man, sacrifices have to be made, right? A million babies were saved just by that one act of love by Bob Dear. So maybe he's a bit off, but cetainly not all that scary.

Picture # 3. Oh those crafty, sneaky Muslims. Look at them with their peace and love bullshit. Ya know, deep down underneath those robes and t shirts all of them were packing suicide vests and Korans. A clever ploy, Islam people. But nobody is buying it. Look at that dude on the left for instance. Che Guevara on his t shirt? Commie. And that chick on the right? Whats underneath that black robe? You tell me, fellow christians. Very scary. All of them. Where's peace office Van Dyke when you need him?

Picture # 4. Ok fellow pale faces. We all KNOW for a fact that guy on the left is the scariest one of all. Look at him with his rage and his desire to kill whitey. All because of uhhhhhh oh I don't even know. What could that guy possible be mad about? I mean after all, he has all the advantages with his blackness and his getting ahead without talent and his blackish President looking out for him. And look at that poor policeman on the right. How scared must he be being stared at by a thug knowing that Obama has jammed up his gun by taking it away from him with all his laws against guns and his Obama laws against cops shooting unarmed black kids like that. Man, lighten up a bit there kid. Just think, in a year or so you will be given some CEO job someplace just cuz you asked for it and a white guy will get fired just so you can be accommodated cuz you're black.

Yep, that's Obama's Amurca. Where hero first responders get in trouble (not really) for shooting black thugs even after they fake being dead lying on the ground or start running away or some other threat to all white people everywhere. And while about 6 million babies are murdered every single day just in that one Colorado Springs Planned Parenthood Clinic and who gets in trouble? A kindly old man with a rifle just protecting the cute lil babies who will become a burden on the same kindly old man after they are born and then he will hate them and complain about all the breeding going on.

And in Obummer's Amurca where Muslims are allowed to say they are against Daesh or Isis or whatever the fuck those assholes are called and the liberal media takes pictures and buys into it? Hey again look at that Che shirt? Commies all! Probably are hiding severed heads behind that sign.

And also in Nobama's America, where scary black youth are allowed stare, STARE, at a friendly Chicago policeman without being in fear of being shot. What has this nation come to?

Thanks Obama. No seriously, Thanks.

Saturday, November 21, 2015

Cheap Trick!


Back in the 1970's while the radio was blasting disco and manufactured garbage that even white people could dance to, there were some rock bands coming out of Illinois and the Midwest that I liked, not loved, but liked probably because there was so little rock to choose from. Ya know, the generic midwest rock band, the REO Speedwagons, the Styx's. the Kansas's and the Cheap Tricks. By the way, nowadays, if REO or Styx or Kansas comes on the radio (yeah I'm old, the radio, bahaaaa) I can't change the station fast enough. Carry on O Way.....click.....Ridin the Storm.......click.....Layyyyydeeee......click.....but...if I hear that opening riff to Surrender, or the high pitched squealing at Budakon, or even that hokey The Flame, I am not going anywhere for the next 3 or so minutes. Cuz Cheap Trick is better than mediocre, they are above average.

Cheap Trick opened yet another new arena we have here in Omaha last night. It's called the Baxter Arena and it exists cuz the University of Omaha wanted its own arena to play hockey and basketball in. It joins the Ralston Arena, the Century Link, the Mid American Center, the Sokol Arena, the Pinnacle Bank Arena and maybe another one I can't remember since the latest stats show there's an arena here for every 6 or 7 citizens. We love our arena here.

As I was saying before being rudely interrupted by my own ramblings, Cheap Trick showed up to christen the new place and see if it could rock the doors off without bringing the place crashing to the ground. And again, though I used to profess to only "like" them, I was again pleasantly surprised that I "liked" them this much. The thing about Cheap Trick, the Weezer of its day, is if you don't care for what they are playing, shit, just wait 3 minutes and they're done and onto another tune. Lots of 3-4 minute power pop tunes pleasing to the ear. Nothing that will make you go WOW, but something that will have you tapping your foot or moving your shoulders like yeah man I like that song.

Hey I have no idea how old lead singer Robin Zander is, he must be 60, but that guy can sing. Man, his voice is fantastic. He hasn't lost anything due to age. And Rick Neilsen, he of the sharp wit, the giant brimmed baseball caps, and the crazy guitars including a 5 necked monstrosity he struggled to carry, is a great guitarist. Tom Petersson, the bassist with the 12 strings to choose from, plucks the rhythm out with the best of them. And I must say, Tom, your cover of Waiting For My Man, the Velvet Underground cover, may have been the highlight of my night. Fucking great.

It was an hour and a half of the best Cheap Trick had to offer, all the hits, and some covers, including Doby Grays The In Crowd which was a pleasure to hear.

But man come on, some groups have one song that makes a career. And Surrender is that tune. For all the great songs to come out of the 1970's, some of which I cannot stand any longer, Surrender is in my Top 10. Sorry but it is. It's ear candy pure and simple. But come on, who doesn't like a little candy now and then?

Friday, November 20, 2015

Take Them Not Me!


Give me your poor and tired and huddled masses trying to escape murderous criminals who say this "Allahu" is all "Akbar" and shit right before they commit unspeakable acts that only a sick fuck like Eli Roth could think up. Yeah, unless of course you happen to be brown or browner or actually believe this "Allahu" is all "Akbar". That Statue of Liberty, given to us by those cheese eating surrender monkeys, the French, says it right there. However, tear the fucking thing down, boys. President Trump and his band of 289 bed wetters in the most disgusting band of politicians in the world, The United States House of Pussies have declared no more refugees from Syria cuz that dead 3 year old was probably faking drowning and has a suicide vest on already to blow up a Wal Mart or something. No no no, no more. Hey Fuck You Daesh, fuck you US House of Scaredy Cats and fuck you you cowardly Governors sucking your loud mouthed constituents cranks.

Look, I understand the fear. Since Fox News came on the scene, talk radio started up fueling the paranoia of really dumb people, and 9/11 occurred, America has become a nation of minorities. No not THOSE kind of minorities, a minority of really LOUD bigots and pussies who walk around packing heat, shouting at town halls, and disrupting local yokel city council meetings with whatever Mark Levin or that dumbfuck Andrea Tantoros told them to think that day. Right after they got done masturbating to Andrea's sand castle making abilities of course.

The LOUD have become the Daesh of this country. Though upwards of 90% of the people want background checks on fat guys buying guns to "protect" their families and maybe someday get to shoot a black guy legally, the LOUD screams and cries and buys off the bed wetting weasels that we all elect to that shit house in D.C. we call the Capitol. And as long as the LOUD, the bigots, the pussies, the paranoids, the religious kooks are allowed to get away with this intimidation, Daesh is already here. Cuz they fucking won. They're called Republicans.

Meanwhile, most of this nation's governors have clutched their pearls and said no Syrians in my state, Obummer! Though these weak kneed jellyfish have no legal authority to do anything about it, the LOUD ones know they still can fool the really dumb that put them into office. Like our esteemed yellow belly of a Governor. The esteemed trust fund baby, Peter Ricketts, a man so conservative with the taxpayers money, ya know cuz he's all tea partyee, he spends untold amounts of Nebraska tax money to haul a couple of knuckleheads along with him on his George W Bush like vacations so nobody can make him shit his Pampers by startling him with a Cubs joke. Ricketts, never a man to not let his money do the talking for him, is putting the screws to resettlement groups to "not participate" in the re locating of Syrian refugees. Watch out resettlement groups of Nebraska, when Pete starts to throw his wallet around to get what he wants, there's no stopping him. And if he runs out of money, he just calls Daddy to resettle more moolah into Petey's trust fund.

It is pretty disgusting what is going on here. This country has so totally soiled its drawers, well at least the tough guy right, because of something that didn't even happen here, the decline has begun.

A cartoon character leads the Republican field for President. A sleepy dimwit is second. A Canadian refugee is third. And a credit card thief is fourth. What the fuck, Republicans? We all know the hierarchy is worried, so worried some of them are contemplating allowing a former loser to lose again just to make it seem somewhat respectable. Ya know, like 55-45 respectable.

Wow, Americans have gone all French by surrendering to Daesh, Isis, Al Queda,and dead 3 year olds .

Whoa.

To the French, congratulations. You have come a long way from the days when really stupid American politicians decided a food you didn't even invent should be called "Freedom Fries". You were right then. And you are right now. You people are tough as nails, just like the writer of the constitution, Jesus Christ.

So to the cheese eating surrender monkeys I say, Je m'excuse........WE are the cheese eating surrender monkeys now.......just make mine Freedom Cheese!

Saturday, November 14, 2015

When Two "Blondes" Merge!

Ann Coulter ✔ @AnnCoulter
They can wait if they like until next November for the actual balloting, but Donald Trump was elected president tonight.
8:17 PM - 13 Nov 2015


Riiiiiiiiiiiiight


Ugh!



I am at a loss for words.......except I can say unequivocally.....Fuck every one of these people...

Saturday, October 17, 2015

Go Flubs Go!


The Cubs are great! They can't lose! It's OUR year! How many times do we have to hear this? Goddamn, I love Chicago, I love Wrigley Field, and I love the fact the Cubs lose every freakin year! Even the losers that are the White Sox have a championship, no two, since the Cubs last won. And one of them came in 1917, when the Ottoman Empire still existed. Give it up Cubs fans. It's destiny.

And now the best reasons to root for the NY Mets.

10) Cubs fans pray and cry and whine and think they are lovable because of it. Nah, you're just losers as is your overrated team.

9) You blame everybody but your shitty management for your loserdom. Goats, curses, black cats, and some geek in left field who didn't do anything you clowns wouldn't have done. Try to catch a free baseball.

8) Speaking of free baseballs, you bleacher drunks bully people into throwing back free baseballs if the opposing team has the utter gall to hit one of your crappy pitchers hanging curve balls out of the stadium. What the fuck. What does that accomplish? Hey Cubs bleacher drunks, throwing a ball back doesn't take 1 run or two off the ancient scoreboard for the team that's about to beat your ass.

7) Wrigley Field, though a shrine to the past, is a pit. Beams, and piss troughs, and creeping jungle vines growing all over the place. The place is again a shrine and the actual reason to go to a Cubs game. But face it. It's a dump.

6) Cubs fans, much like Nebraska fans, actually think the whole country roots for them. Nah, not so much Cubbie fans. Most of you are preppy little fucks who treat a baseball game like one of your wine and cheese parties. Oh how cute, they lost again. I just love them so much, when does that Ernie Banks bat again?

5) Cubs fans love that goddamned 7th inning stretch where some attention seeking "celebrity" tries to sing Take Me Out To The Ballgame. I've been to Wrigley many times and the only "celebrity" I ever saw sing was Harry Carey. That moldy tradition should have died with him. And that fucking annoying ass other song.

4) They traded Lou Brock to the Cardinals. Good lord, if that alone doesn't make you hate them, nothing will. The creeps running that team at the time had a building named after them in downtown Chicago and to save money, and get a lousy white pitcher in return, they dumped one of the greatest players ever.

3) They are named the "Cubs'. Christ, at least the mighty Chicago Bears are named after a fully grown animal. Thee clowns are named after a baby. Oh its so cute. Look at them lose.

2) Lee Elia. Never a truer statement has been made about Cubs fans. I fucking love Lee Elia.

1) The owners of this miserable team. The Ricketts family. These lousy fucks are great Republican hypocrites. While Joe Ricketts, the old man, was ranting about government spending, he was holding up Illinois taxpayers to fix that shitty stadium and stick a giant big screen TV up so he could pretend it wasn't a 103 year old dump. Old man Joe started a millions of dollars campaign in 2012 to racially attack Barack Obama, and backed off when it was found out. Pete Ricketts, bored with his money, bought the Governor's mansion in a state stupid enough to elect his bald ass. My Nebraska. Nice going farmfucks. Not to mention this family of Ewings support of rat faced Scott Walker, another loser.

So fuck the Chicago Cubs, fuck their fans, and fuck their owners. Damns I started this as a lark, and now I am genuinely pissed off.

Let's go Mets.

Monday, October 12, 2015

Avoiding The Dumb!


I have been inn the midst of avoiding Trump and his daily serving of dumb people flakes, dodging the constant proof that being a brain surgeon doesn't mean you aren't a crazy person, and trying to find what financial institution is going to buy into the first woman president being a Republican and either a blatant liar or a person who thinks Rosemary's Baby was a documentary on the birth of Barack Look At Its Eyes Obama.

So Ive been going to movies, and football games and watching shit on TV like Hand of God, Fear The Walking Dead or that maniacal American Horror Story. The TV is so scary that I often check to see if the Republicans are debating again (Hand of God), there's another televised gun nut rally (Fear the Walking Dead) or I'm in a bad dream and Carly Fiorina has been elected POTUS (American Horror Story starring Carly Fiorina, errrrrrrrrr, Lady Gaga).

In order see the following cuz, quite frankly, these four are all pretty good.

4) Everest

This is a movie featuring people with a death wish. People not content with watching shit on TV but going to the other extreme and trying to climb a fucking mountain in Nepal. Personally, I'll kill myself with bad food watching shit on TV but if you want to die freezing to death climbing Mount Everest hey knock yourself out.

Jason Clarke (The Chicago Code,yep, saw him on a shit TV show), is the climbing guide with a hunky Aussie accent and a waiting at home Keira Knightley, did I mention he's also very dumb? He leads Josh Brolin, an arrogant Texan (thats a stretch), Dougie from House of Cards, Teardrop from Winter's Bone, Jake Gyllenhaal from everywhere and a host of others up Mt.Everest and after they make it (of course) all hell breaks loose and (spoiler alert) they all die, except for Josh Brolin who has Robin Wright in a fat suit at home being all Claire Underwood and bringing him home alive cuz she's effing Robin Wright.

It's a spectacular CGI movie, and it really is thrilling to see the top of the world on a big screen. And it's a 3 star movie. Well worth the matinee price. But man, are these people crazy.


3) The Martian

I know everyone is raving about this flick. And yes, it's pretty good. But it is wayyyyyy too long. I felt like I was trapped on a Martian movie palace after it was over.

Matt Damon is trapped on Mars after Murph from Interstellar (a far superior movie) leaves him behind while running from some Martian like storm that used left over effects from Everest. Matt is a botanist so he grows shit on Mars using actual human crap and survives for years by being a space like McGuyver while the Earth tries to get him back before he starts talking to a volleyball.

Do they get him back? Well you'll have to go see it to find out. Will McAvoy, Jeff Daniels really isnt for it and he runs NASA now so if Matt gets back or not is kind of iffy.

It's one of those movies I really want to love, and don't. But it really is good. A solid 3 star movie, though at times some of the effects look like the Lego Movie lent them some props.

2) The Walk

Yeah yeah, Man On Wire is far superior but to see this story of a Frenchmen walking on a wire from Twin Tower to Twin Tower back in 1974 is pretty captivating. And see it in Imax and 3D or you might not think much of the movie cuz the 3D effects of being up above the ground 110 stories and you're there is eye closing scary.

Joseph Gordon-Levitt is spectacular as always. Ben Kingsley is weirdo Svengali guy and the rest of the cast is where have I seen them before types.

But when he finally walks the wire, it is beyond thrilling. The effects are superior and if you have those stupid 3D glasses on, well, good luck if you have a fear of heights.

But this really is a movie about the Twin Towers. The sight of them again is moving and hopefully we have all moved beyond the dumb hey Simpsons, dont show the Simpsons go to New York episode cu somebody might get sad phase.

I dare you to not feel a twinge in your gut at the closing shot of the Towers in this movie. As a movie this is a 2 1/2 star type, in 3D and Imax it goes way up to 3 1/2.

1) Sicario

Ok now I admit that Traffic is in my Top 20 of all Time movie list, right below Disorderlies (kidding, Disorderlies is way down there about 48 or so). I love Traffic, and Benicio Del Toro won a well deserved Oscar for it. He was a good guy sticking up for the future rapist Mexican kids.

Sicario is a Traffic and a Zero Dark Thirty clone. And its is the best movie I've seen this year.

Emily Blunt is the FBI agent recruited by arrogant Texan Josh Brolin (again?) to participate in some sort of international hunt for a Mexican drug King. Benicio Del Toro is the mysterious Alejandro who kind of hangs around being all who is this guy working for?

Emily Blunt goes along and becomes more and more disgusted by what she sees. Some could say naive' about what she sees. And she is great. But this is Benicio Del Toro's movie, period. As good a character he is in Traffic, he is as bad as they come in Sicario. Proving what a great actor he is, Del Toro is chilling in his drive for revenge. He is a cant take your eyes off him actor. I cannot emphasize how good he is in this movie.

It is wonderfully shot in the washed out colors of the desert. The scene of a border crossing, and the return back across the border is a film geek's dream. A how did they do that type of series. It is so great.

Sicario is edge of your seat. It is depressingly real. And it is a 4 star film. The best of 2015 as far as I am concerned.


Now back to the Dumb.

Saturday, October 3, 2015

All Potential Mass Murderers Get A Discount!


There are some bad fucking people in this world. Yeah there's your mass killers like CHRISTOPHER HARPER-MERCER (yeah say his fucking name over and over, sorry if it ruins your wine and cheese soiree) and then there's the really bad people. No not the mass killers like DICK CHENEY ,but the ones who think they're good and honorable and are just, in reality, sick sociopaths.

Like SHERIFF JOHN HANLIN of Douglas County Oregon. This prick seems to think if he doesn't mention CHRISTOPHER HARPER-MERCER"S name then nobdoy will realize what a shitty law enforcement creep this guy really is. This dumb constable of the law has made a living out of being one of those rubes who actually believe that the black guy in the White House is coming to take his dick away. This bumbling fool of a cop actually posted Sandy Hook truther videos to Facebook (which have suddenly been removed) as he put on his tin foil sheriff's hat to go protect Douglas County Oregon from the fedrull gubmint and its black panther muslim army. Sheriff Hanlin also wrote an actual letter to, oh no not that black interloper who hijacked HIS White House, but to the white guy, Vice President Joe Biden, expressing his concern that taking a gun away from ADAM FUCKING LANZA would have done nothing to prevent Sandy Hook cuz like it didn't happen anyway and when the Obummer administration does pass some sort of law taking guns away from psycho nut cases like JARED LOUGHNER, then he simply won't enforce suck laws cuz loser crazy people like CHRISTOPHER HARPER-MERCER have 2nd amendment rights too.....

Apparently SHERIFF JOHN HANLIN is very good at NOT enforcing laws anyway. Go fuck yourself you self righteous incompetent Barney Fife.

Then there's CANDI KINNEY, owner of the Roseburg Gun Shop, ya know Roseburg, Oregon, where some guy exercising his 2nd amendment rights took life liberty and the pursuit of happiness away from 9 people who have no rights cuz of uhhhhhhh 2nd Amendment. She loves mass killings cuz there's always a rush on the killing weapons right afterwards by the Dirty Harry types just itchin to kill somebody. It's the American Dream, baby. Make a lot of money exploiting the misfortune of others. Just ask your average hedge fund creep. Yeah inside the gun shop up in Roseburg (sounds awful "jewey" to me) is a life sized poster of the Nobama in a keffiyeh with the scribbling underneath "gun salesman of the year". Well at least somebody in that den of moral sewage can spell.

And then there's JEB! BUSH, potential Republican nominee in 2016 (barf) whose reaction to the death of 9 innocents is "stuff happens". Now Jeb!, everyone now knows you are actually the dumb one, you've proven that over the last 6 months, but also being the family asshole? Wow, Barbara Bush has been playing that role for years and now we know it was just a mother protecting her unfeeling prick of an offspring. Is it really Republican strategy, in the wake of Trump mania, to climb all over each other to become the loudest and nastiest dick in the room? Good job Jeb! You really weren't even trying, its just your nature. Trump is just exploiting dummies by yammering on about shit he doesn't even mean. Jeb! I am convinced. You're just a natural at being a villain.

Edmund Burke, conservative spank bank author (look him up conservatives) said it best........The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.

Yeah I know they think its "evil" like the mooslim socialist gun grabber but in reality the "evil" looks back at you when you pose for selfies with your gun.

Friday, October 2, 2015

Kim Who? Yeah Yeah Give Her A Rosary And Send Her On Her Way!


First of all I am a complete Pope Francis fanboy. After all those years of stiffs like Paul VI and Reagan like nice guys with antiquated views like JP2 and Nazis like Benny, not to mention JP1, the one they "murdered" for being Francis before his time, this guy is making me yearn for the days when I was young and stupid and believed in all that Catholic shit.

But alas, he's a horrible guy just like all of them. He "met" with newly turned Republican bigot Kim Davis while in Philly and endorsed all of her bigot views on the queers and the lezbos getting hitched down there in her old Kentucky home, where the people are all gay(???) and the darkies have to part(???). Jesus Christ, Kim, have you ever sung that song and actually listened? Even American Pharaoh went what the fuck?

Now, of course, the Vatican is saying hey hey now, the Pope had no idea who this Amish bitch was and shit he blesses everybody anyway so lay the fuck off. Or words to that effect.

And I believe them for maybe the first time in my life. Hey now, there's a lot of cardinals and bishops out there who don't care for this guy. He rides in a Fiat, and he visits the bums, errrrr, homeless and he calls capitalism out on being the rigged game it is, and he says hey lay off the abortion and gay marriage shit, there's starving people in the world. Whoaaaaa there Pope my man. Have you checked the financials on the Vatican lately? We've never been more solid. Even with the payouts to those whiny ass child abuse pussies we have more candlesticks and relics than we know what to do with.

But the Pope don't care. He cares about people. Unlike the bean counters who make up the hierarchy of 95% of American Catholic dioceses, this guy sees the downtrodden as the heroes, not the rich monkeys trying to buy their way into heaven.

It is completely possible that this Pope was set up by Cardinal Carlo Vigano, the Apostolic Nuncio to the Unied States, in other words, he's the Vatican's Ambassador. Cardinal Vigano is a complete ass kisser to the still alive Nazi Pope, Benedict. So what would keep this Benedict Youth from setting the Pope up with perhaps the most despised woman in America, at least to those of us who want to like Francis so much we ignore the fact he's really just a Eisenhower Republican. Yeah see, all you liberal scumbuckets who cry about all those Syrians and the tramps and the homos and the diddled with kiddies, see, he's just like us. An uncaring asshole. So there!

Well it didn't work with me. I never thought this whole Davis/Pope deal looked anything other than fishy and not just on Friday. It's like those pictures political opponents creep us out with. Those photo ops that mean nothing where Rosalyn Carter is standing next to Jim Jones. or Bill Clinton is standing next to Monica Whatshername or Barack Obama is standing next to anybody or when the poofs stand next to Reagan, oh hold on there, that's blasphemy!

The Pope meeting with a law breaker like Kim Davis didn't mean anything more than when he went to the prison and met with inmates. For chrissakes,when he went to the prison he didnt endorse murder,rape or white collar crime, wait, none of those guys are in prison what was I thinking. It was a humanitarian gesture, and got him away from more photo ops with creepy politicians. The inmates are a better class of people anyway.

So lay off my boy, The Pope. Meeting with a scofflaw bigot like Kim Davis was no different than meeting with John Boehner where at least he had the effect of causing self reflection and a fuck this I'm outta here result. Davis and her ambulance chasing lawyers are up to no good. And her meet with the Pope had no effect other than her being the fall bigot for a grander scheme. The self aggrandizement of publicity hounds like the Liberty Counsel, and Benedict sympathizers like Cardinal Vigano.

I got your back, Jorge!

Thursday, October 1, 2015

U S A! U S A! U S A!


The tiny dicks win again.

Say did ya know a conceal carry permit holder did nothing today at the mass shooting of the day because he was afraid the SWAT team would shoot him?

Say did ya know the Congress of the United States won't allow the government to gather data on gun violence?

Say did ta know there's already gun nuts out there claiming Obama has had the shooter's social media history wiped and changed to fit his agenda of not taking their guns away?

Say did ya know there have been 45 school shootings in the 274 days of 2015? Or approximately one every 6 days?

Say did ya know there will another one next week?

Say did ya know that I'm gonna go puke now?

Fuck all of you who feel nothing but love for your guns right now.

Monday, September 28, 2015

A Chump, A Hump And A Trump!


Wow. I was holding off writing about this Republican orgy of dumb because I figured by now the party faithless would have fallen into line, had their butlers throw the trailer park trash out , and gotten back to the coronation of Jeb The Dullard to be the next loser they put up to be the victim of massive voter fraud.

But alas, or rather WOO HOO, the rube section of the party has continued to lie to pollsters and express their support for a loudmouthed reality show star, a failed CEO and a brain surgeon who apparently practiced on his own cerebellum. LOTS.

Trump. What can you say? I don't know. Just ask him and his media pimps and he'll carry on like a failing used car salesman by saying your first name over and over as he tries to keep you from walking out the door. Scott Scott no Scott you see Scott my tax plan Scott is terrific Scott because it has a zero percent rate Scott I've never told anyone that Scott. So you see all Trump needs is a plaid suit to go along with his plaid mind. I'm sick of his shit. But then again, my IQ approaches 80 so repetition kind of gets annoying. I don't forget as easily as the Trump lovers dumb enough to give a billionaire another $25 for a $1 truckers hat.

Carly Fiorina. I guess getting your ass kicked by a vulnerable Barbara Boxer in a Senate race wasn't enough to squelch that ego. Fiorina, whose main asset seems to be she's not Hillary, is regarded as Republican royalty now by the types who think going 2 for 4 in a Triple A All Star Game makes you the next Mike Trout or winning a $10,000 claiming race at Santa Anita means it Breeders Cup time. Fiorina, who was let into the major leagues for the last debate simply because she's a chick, sorry chicks, it's true, has gone all in on lying and lying and lying again because real life is not a current Republican litmus test.

Planned Parenthood has taken babies out of a woman, let it kick and cry on a table, while a Basil Rathbone voice says off camera, vee must keep it alive so vee can harvest its brains. Carly has seen the video, with her own eyes and goddammit don't talk to her about unless you too ave seen it which is probably impossible since it doesn't exist. Much like 30,000 jobs didn't exist right after she took HP down the shitter. Oh you can see the video if you really want to. Its on her website. Wait, it isn't? Oh yeah cuz it doesn't exist. Much like Carly's kid who died of drinking way too much. Well the kid existed but Carly has as much to do with making her as she did with creating any jobs at HP.

But that face! No not the Trump version of her face. The one that's not quite foreign or 20 something enough for Donnie boy. No I'm talking about that permanent face she has that makes people see it and then take a quick right turn cuz you know she's out to get somebody at all times. Put a nun's habit on Carly and I'd have to go for PTSD treatment. YIKES!

Ben Carson. He operates on brains. And he's black. Proof positive that some Republicans will tell a pollster they would vote for a black guy they know has the same chance of winning as a Confederate Flag bearing nitwit does at having a brain Ben Carson would even bother to operate on.

Carson is living proof that you can be a very smart man. In one area. And be a raving loony bird in all other areas. Carson doesn't like them Muslims much. He thinks Obamacare is worse than slavery. He thinks you go into prison a manly man and come out all swishy and gay. He thinks the Bible is the best economics book ever for all tax rates shalleth be 10% because of what it sayeth in the 2000 year old Book of Fairy Tales. He loves to push that old standard that while the Nazis were burning Margaret Sanger books they secretly masturbated to her picture cuz she wanted to eugenics out the blacks and Jewey people.

Carson stands onstage at debates in a kind of Nosferatu mode. Sleepy and droopy eyed, Carson wakes up just in time to answer a question with a delivery so slow I half expect him to doze off in mid sentence. I know I do when the good doctor starts droning on about something he knows nothing about. Carson is also the whitest man I know. Hell, his attempted response to Donald Trumps high five was the whitest moment maybe ever. Right on, brother!

Wow, Republicans. This is your win, place and show? I am speechless.

Thursday, August 20, 2015

Off To College!


Tomorrow is the day Max's Dad & Mom sends Max off to college. Jesus, where has this time gone? It was about 6 months ago, or so it seems, we were dropping him off at kindergarten. It seems like a month ago we were touring the new middle school. It seems a week ago we were sending him to the same high school Max's Uncle attended. It seems like yesterday that Max was still living with us. Oh it was. Sometimes what seems like yesterday actually was yesterday. If I could stop time, believe me, I would. Not to keep me young, but to keep Max young.

Going off to college was overwhelming 40 years ago, when I left. Christ, I was scared shitless. And I had pretty much been so independent I could handle anything. Except I couldn't. Two weeks into the college experience, I was walking back to the dorm from a night class when suddenly I became so vulnerable and unsure of myself, I sat down on a bench in the middle of the campus and cried. I missed my home, my parents, my brother, my dog, my safety net. I was ready to come home and quit. Thank goodness it was a time when no cell phone existed, no social media existed, no way for me to cry for help. I had to tough it out. And I did. But it was rough, real rough.

I don't want it to be rough for Max. I want it to be easy for him. But I know it will not be. He is much less independent than me. He counts on his mother and me to be there for him. And I fear we won't be when it gets hard. Actually I fear he won't ask us to be there. I didn't. I gutted it out on my own and dammit I wish I hadn't. I wish I had the options kids have today. The cell phones, the social media, the skype, the easy access to help. I had a collect call back home. And the United States Mail. I wrote my Dad a lot. Always addressed it to his office. It wasn't so much to ask for anything, it was more of a hey I'm still here, and I think about you a lot. I hope Max does that, only by text or email or cell phone. That would have been so great in 1975.

Max is a lot like me. Socially uncomfortable. Shy. A bit of a stick in the mud. But so much smarter than me. But nowhere near as street smart. That bugs me. Did we coddle him too much? Did we prepare him for life? Did we concentrate too much on being his buddy and not his parents? I hope not. He will probably be all right, but what if he isn't? That's on us. That concerns me.

Damn, it's like I'm going into a new chapter of life too. The whole empty nest shit doesn't bother me at all. I talk to Max's Mom all the time. It's not like we'll sit around in silence. Sitting around, yes. Silence, hardly. Just wait till Donald Trump comes on TV with another of his simpleton appealing terrific "ideas". She'll be begging for silence. But with Max not here, not coming in at midnight or 1 am or whenever, I will be very empty. Does he need me anymore? Does he treasure any memories? Will he ever come home? These are all concerns I have rattling around in my low self esteem brain.

I know kids every year, millions of them, go away to school. And 99.9% of them make bad choices at some point. What will be Max's bad choices? We never drank or smoked around him. I yelled a lot, as I always have, and he yells too. I am reminded of the old Taxi TV show where Jim, an intelligent straight A student at Harvard, meets Tom Hanks and eats the funny brownie and the rest is history. I know its a bizarre thing to think of, but this is my mind at this time.

Are you sure I can't stop time?

Saturday, August 15, 2015

The Stanford Prison Experiment!


Just a quick aside and movie recommendation.

Back in 1971 I remember a Life Magazine (yeah I'm old) featuring an article about a little experiment done during the summer at Stanford where a bunch of students, trying to pick up some grass money, volunteered to become either prison inmates or guards for two weeks. What happened was classic psychology. And expected.

The guards became power hungry assholes and the inmates became unhinged and timid. Gee,really?

Anyway a movie has been released about this "experiment". It's not a documentary, its an actual film with actors and directors and writers. And it is fascinating, frightening and features some of the best young acting talent I have ever seen.

Go see it before it goes away. It will keep you captivated the entire time. It will make you wonder what you would do in this situation. It will make you angry, sad and bewildered. And you can go home and look up all this young acting talent on IMDB since you will go "where have I seen him before" or "wow that guy is good and I want to see more"

Never thought these words would come out of anyone's mouth, but one of the actors has the privilege of being in the two best movies of the year. Well my best two anyway.

Good Deal!


Wow. The only thing that was more surprising at that Donald Trump coming out party last week on Fox News than the John Kasich actually doesnt wanna kill all the gays speech, is that Jeb Bush is such a dullard. This guy, the presumed coronation prince, is such a stiff that Hillary started dumping top secret e-mails on Skype for everyone to see.

Now we all knew that Jeb Bush was really the dumb one, I mean for chrissakes he goes by "Jeb", but who knew he was both dumb and dull?

Jeb is in Iowa this week sucking up to people so enamored with themselves every 4 years or so they actually act proud of that fucking butter cow. It's Iowa State Fair week in Des Moines or wherever and every hick from East Moline to Omaha goes to see whatever country act is stealing their money this year. And every dick from Chris Christie to Carly Fiorina shows up to play Harold Hill and fleece the rubes. And despite wearing bread bags on their shoes like all Iowans, the shit is impossible to avoid.

Jeb the Dullard is running around Iowa giving his brother, the not as dumb as Jeb one, a hand job by doubling down on the Iraq War being a good thing, or in Jebspeak, a "good deal". Ya see, to Jeb, who is being sucked off by the same bunch of war criminals that gave us that "good deal", the fact that Saddam Hussein is gone, made it all worth it. All the instability left in the wake of Saddam's demise aint brother George's fault, its that Bill Clinton, husband of Hitlery, and that Obummer guy's fault cuz Paul Wolfowitz and Stephen Hadley said so.

You remember Wolfowitz, the guy with the comb and that greasy hair. Wolfowitz is the guy who as soon as he saw a Tower on fire, instead of hollering "what the fuck" hollered "INVADE IRAQ!!!" Wolfowitz, who ought to be in a foreign jail someplace, is "advising" the dumb Bush on foreign policy. Hey,America, wake up! It's happening again.

And Stephen Hadley. Remember this asshole? The guy who stuck the infamous 16 words into the 2003 State of The Union speech delivered by the not as dumb as Jeb Bush brother. "The British government has learned that Saddam Hussein recently sought significant quantities of uranium from Africa." Well other than the fact that the British do have a government and there is uranium in Africa someplace, the rest of it was a fucking lie.

Yep, these guys are in Jeb's ear. Remember that for when Trump quits and Jebbie suddenly becomes the party favorite again cuz his name is familiar or something.

The Iraq War was a "good deal".

Right.

Tell that to the 4500 American families who lost a loved one in that "good deal".

Tell that to the hundreds of thousands of Iraqi families who lost loved ones in that "good deal". In fact considering 3000 or so lives were lost on 9/11, I think we have made up for it and should call it even.

Tell that to the Tea Party Nitwits complaining about the national debt and out of control spending cuz they really care about themselves their children and grandchildren. Anywhere from $2 trillion to $6 trillion spent on this "good deal"? Oh I know Teabaggers think $6 trillion is how much is spent each year giving the blacks and the gays and the illegals more rights than they have but some may accept reality liberal nonsense someday.

Yeah Jeb, "good deal".

Thursday, August 13, 2015

Jimmy Carter!


In retrospect, this is one cool dude. Jimmy Carter. Revealed to have cancer yesterday and at 90 that aint good.

The greatest living ex-president, only a fucking dick would argue with that, who travels the world looking out for the downtrodden instead of enriching himself, is in dire straights. But ya know, Jimmy Carter probably doesn't think so. I wouldn't be surprised to see him out there building houses or feeding orphans soon enough.

This guy came along in 1975 running for President against the likes of Hubert Humphrey and Ed Muskie and all those other Democrats who were shoo ins. And Jimmy Carter kicked all their asses. And my Dad and I were not happy. The smile, the humble act, the Jesus. Who trusted that back in 1976? Nope. This guy was up to something.

We got over it of course. I mean who the hell in my family was going to vote for that stumblebum, Gerald Ford? It was my first vote for President and though Carter wasn't Frank Church he also wasn't a flippin Republican.

Jimmy Carter may have been the perfect man for the time. The 1970's sucked. Forget all the nostalgia and the bullshit revisionist history. The 1970's blew.

And Jimmy Carter took the hit. As America stopped growing up and instead regressed back into believing lies, Carter told it like it was. The famous malaise speech. Listen to it again. He was right. but America wanted lies and bullshit, a trend continuing on today.

Jimmy Carter may have not been the greatest President ever, but it's hard to argue he isn't the best human being ever. Come on, The Allman Brothers standing with a President? That was the best!

Sunday, August 9, 2015

Keith's Rubbish!


A mishmash of rubbish. Ok, Keith Richards. Ok fine, let's see what he actually said. Oh yeah, about the Beatles. That album. Sgt Pepper.

What Keith said to Esquire was this:

No, I understand—the 
Beatles sounded great when they were the Beatles. But there's not a lot of roots in that music. I think they got carried away. Why not? If you're the Beatles in the '60s, you just get carried away—you forget what it is you wanted to do. You're starting to do Sgt. Pepper. Some people think it's a genius album, but I think it's a mishmash of rubbish, kind of like Satanic Majesties—"Oh, if you can make a load of shit, so can we."


The Beatles sounded great when they were the Beatles.

Yep, cant disagree with that.

But there's not a lot of roots in that music.

Yep. Can't disagree with that either.


I think they got carried away. Why not?

Yep, definitely carried away.

If you're the Beatles in the '60s, you just get carried away—you forget what it is you wanted to do.

Yep, can't disagree with that either.

You're starting to do Sgt. Pepper. Some people think it's a genius album, but I think it's a mishmash of rubbish, kind of like Satanic Majesties—"Oh, if you can make a load of shit, so can we."

Ok, yep get it, Keith. can't disagree with that either, especially that part about if you can make a load of shit, so can we.

So what's the big hub bub about?

Keith Richards doesn't like Sgt.Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band. Cuz it has no roots. And the Beatles forgot what it is they wanted to do. And they got carried away.

And thank fucking Gawd all of that is true.

The Beatles albums did not have any roots after 1965. It's because they made their own fucking roots and stopped recreating old blues stuff because they got bored with it and had stuff rolling around in their heads nobody had ever heard before. Yeah they forgot what it is what they wanted to do, like most people who grow up and accept reality. Or in the Beatles case, realize what they wanted to do wasn't anywhere near what they felt they HAD to do. And yep, Keith, they got carried away.

Got so damned carried away they put things on that album nobody had ever heard before. Pushed by Brian Wilson to bust out of the image and do whatever it is they wanted to do. Good for them.

Oh I have to resist the Stones bashing. I will. The roots are there, Keith. Keep paying tribute. That's fine if that's what you wish to do. But to hammer on others who create roots of their own is just plain lazy.

Some day just compare Sgt Peppers to Their Satanic Majesties Request.

There's only one "load of shit" there. Not two.

And one masterpiece.

Saturday, August 8, 2015

Trump's Time Of Month!


Man, it's hard to ignore this prick, Trump. The guy is a trainwreck, a bigot, a pig and total classless clod but damn he is entertaining in that what the fuck sort of way.

The Republican food fight is over. For now. Roger Ailes sent his attack dogs out to eliminate this loudmouthed blockhead from the polls in this debate and they may well have succeeded. Megyn Kelly, who looks like a Trump trophy wife, was the bait. Trump doesn't care about a shill like Chris Wallace or a neckless hobbit like Bret Baier, he's busily sizing up Kelly and her blonde locks for his trophy wall. And Kelly hung herself over the boat waiting for the corn husk haired shark to jump. He did.

Of course he fucking did. He can't help it. Donald Trump is a thin skinned bully who really really hates women who stand up to his bullshit. Shit, he couldn't even let go a years long feud with Rosie O'Donnell in taking the bait. Wow. Trump has declared financial bankruptcy on a few occasions and now he has declared moral bankruptcy in front of 24 million people.

After the "debate", which quite frankly I couldn't care less about, Trump took to twitter as he always does to start in with his insults. Kelly is a "bimbo" a "loooozer". Frank Luntz is a "slob". All of this from a so called billionaire at 3 am? So wired up that someone, especially some broad, would stand up to him and call him on his own words he can't even wait till morning. Then last night on CNN, Donald Trump landed on the boat and Megyn Kelly stabbed him with the harpoon. "She was bleeding from the eyes, bleeding from the whatever".

Now that may be funny to the Trump male voters, some of the dumbest living creatures on Earth. However, to most women. Not funny. Oh yeah there's some women who think that funny, more of the dumbest creatures on Earth, but really?

Donald, you're done. Get back on Celebrity Apprentice where you belong. Go back to "firing" "celebrities". Go back to being a pompous ass in front of hundreds of viewers (I admit it I fast forward thru it to the boardroom parts). Go back to fantasizing about dating your daughter. Go back to schmoozing with Gary Busey or Meat Loaf.

Yep, by falling into Roger Ailes trap, by reacting to obvious baiting by blonde chicks who can read a script, You, Donald Trump, have picked the wrong fuckin guy to fuck with!

Bye Bye!

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

Happy Birthday Mister President!


54 years ago a baby Damien Obama, or Barry Soweto, or Nobama Obummer was born in Kenya or Indonesia or Calgary or the Panama Canal Zone but definitely not in 'Merica. The satan child of Saul Alinsky and Angela Davis, little Barry Alinsky was raised by the Manson Family East in Kenya or Indonesia but definitely not in the U S A U S A! In keeping with the giant conspiracy to one day install a Kenyan born Muslim Nazi Socialist Anti-Colonialist Homo Demoncrat into the presidency, the liberal media and its minions, yep those lil yellow minions, kept up a 40 some year "story" of how lil Barack grew up in Hawaii (sort of America) and went to Columbia University and Harvard though nobody ever saw him in either place and yet he went there on affirmative action cuz he's dumb cuz he's black like his dumb wife, Moochelle. So yes, he never went there but he did go there on the taxpayer dime. Makes sense.

The Soros Family kept up the facade by dressing up lil Barry in University of Hawaii t shirts and swinging a baseball bat even though he was actually on the beaches of Indonesia and swinging a cricket bat. Clever Soros family.

All through his conspiracy fueled life, little Barry Alinsky-Davis just kept believing that someday, America would be so dumbed down they would first elect this son of Ed Asner and Sandra Fluke to the Illinois State Senate where he would totally cause 9/11, then elect him to the United States Senate where he could totally cause Hurricane Katrina and then finally, the Presidency of the United States of America!

Now it's done. The destruction of America thanks to the lil guy hatched from a pod 54 years ago in somewhere totally not in America.

Happy Hatch Day, President Barack Hussein Obama. Keep up the good work!

Sunday, August 2, 2015

UFC MMA RIP!


I don't get it. UFC or MMA or street brawling or any of it. What would be illegal and get you jail time in a bar or on the street is perfectly fine in some kind of octagon with bars and doors and thousands of drunks and sadists.

I love or rather loved boxing. I was fortunate to grow up in the 60's and 70's with Ali and Frazier and Foreman and Norton and Holmes. I could name you every Muhammed Ali fight from 1962 onward. Ooo Ooo check out the knockout punch Ali threw against Cleveland Williams. Loved the sweet science.

But now? Ehhhh. Unless it's Bud Crawford knocking out Gamboa or going back and watching fight films of the 1930's when the sport meant something I don't pay attention to boxing any longer. I mean come on, Vladimir Klitschko is one of the most sleep installing fighters ever.

UFC or MMA is the rage among people younger than me. I hear about it constantly and have no idea what they are talking about. There are young guys I work with who aspire to be MMA or UFC fighters. They all have one thing in common. My wishing to be anywhere else when they start talking about MMA or UFC. Jesus, stop!

Ronda Rousey beat some Brazilian last night in 34 seconds and is now all the talk of the street brawling world. I've seen stories about Ronda Rousey, how she grew up, how her father killed himself, how her mother encourages this behavior and used to fight herself. How attractive she is. Yeah great ears! Yum.

Ronda Rousey usually beats people up within 30 seconds, often within 20 seconds, and people fork over $50 to watch, kind of like the guys who like to watch women's hair pulling competitions over some useless dude. Yahoo!

I don't know. I'm old. I am not fond of this sport. I'd prefer refs and gloves and rules. Shit, one of these days they'll be a sport where the fighters are allowed to exercise their 2nd Amendment rights and just shoot each other.

Anyway I'll go back to yelling at kids to get off my lawn and kick back and enjoy REAL entertainment. RIP Roddy!

Saturday, August 1, 2015

AP History!


Oh thank Allah that Max got thru AP History in his senior year of high skool and got an A. As Max's Mom and I await his going away to join ISIS we see the College Board has finally done something about that anti-American AP History shit the were teaching and now have made the textbook a 400 page book that says on every page America Fuck Yeah!

Now finally, young uns will be taught the correct version of American History instead of the truth, real American history about shit like how fucking great we are and how fucking great we are!

You know like:

1) The American Revolution was inspired by God and how guys dressed like Indians to cover their own asses brave patriotic conservatives threw all that tea in the bay cuz Britain was really taxing them too much. God hates taxes, especially British taxes.

2) Slavery was allowed because it featured full employment with medical for all the blacks rescued from their homeland where a whole lot of other blacks kept them in slavery and white guys with jungle fever love in their hearts saved them from a fate worse than being whipped and thrown overboard and kept in chains. Those ungrateful blahhhh people need to be thanking the white man instead of being pissed off all the time when a courageous white cop kills an unarmed blaaaaa maniac.

3) Manifest Destiny was God's way of making his chosen people masters of the world like he meant it to be in the Garden of Eden when he created Abba Adam & Eve. Anything the gets in the way? See slavery above. You're welcome Crazy Horse.

4) The Civil War was all about slavery Southern Pride, slavery state's rights to keep people in chains employed, and slavery the threat of the evil federal government led by the man who caused 100% unemployment of all blacks, almost as bad as Obummer, Abe Lincoln.

5) The genocide christian conversion of the Native American was in reality a good thing. I mean come on, all that dancing around asking for rain, what kind of nonsense is that? Praise Jesus you heathens. You'll be better off.

6) The 16th Amendment saved America was Satan inspired and the result of thinking like Nobama has. The income tax is the price paid to live in America worst thing ever. Repeal the Amendment now.

7) Communism is whatever rights I don't get. Gay rights, women rights, black rights, mexican rights, Caitlin Jenner rights, all inspired by brave men and women Communist agitators. Joe McCarthy was a drunk hero. He embarrassed saved America from commies like Oliver Wendall Douglas.

8) Vietnam was fought to enrich the defense industry to free the people of Vietnam from a freely elected leader commie dictator named Ho Chi Minh who had a totally awesome evil looking beard like Lenin. We totally won even though the liberal media says we lost.

9) Ronald Reagan is the greatest American who ever lived. Period. All hail Ronald Reagan. Ronald Reagan raised taxes 11 times never ever even thought of raising taxes. Ronald Reagan proved that trickle down economics is just the rich pissing on your head worked cuz everybody was rich beyond belief back in the 80's. Like in that documentary Wall Street.

10) Ronald Reagan is the 3rd worst greatest President who ever lived. Period. He totally caused unnecessary tension took down the Soviet Union all by himself freeing millions of slaves around the world but good slaves, white ones, not the ungrateful blaaaaa ones we have here.

11) Barack Obummer is the 2nd best president of my lifetime epitome' of bad presidents. He collapsed a thriving economy, allowed terrorists to take down the Towers, caused Hurricane Katrina, started ISIS, lost the Iraq War, was totally born in Kenya, and has a wife with a big ass.

12) America is number one in everything. No matter what the facts say liberal lies say. we are exceptional! All of us Republicans are exceptional. It must be true because Joe Stalin Ronald Reagan said it. And Ronald Reagan is the false idol greatest American of all time.

America! Fuck Yeah!