Friday, December 25, 2015

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas everyone. But beware, while you're drinking, evil is still plotting. Trump, Daesh, Trump, Cruz, Trump, NRA, Trump, yeah that's about it .

Happy Holidays.....oops.

Tuesday, December 22, 2015

The Opposition!

Q38 Would you support or oppose bombing
Support bombing Agrabah 30% ..............................
Oppose bombing Agrabah 13% ..............................
Not sure 57%

That's what we are dealing with.....30% of Republicans want to bomb a fictional country. But hey, at least 13% don't want to bomb a fictional country.

Do you believe that thousands of Arabs in New
Jersey cheered when the World Trade Center
collapsed on 9/11 or not?
Believe thousands of Arabs in New Jersey
cheered when the World Trade Center
collapsed on 9/11............................................
Do not believe thousands of Arabs in New
Jersey cheered when the World Trade Center
collapsed on 9/11............................................
Not sure 29%

Hey where's the question if the 9/11 terrorists arrived via magic carpet?

You want your country back? Really?

Monday, December 14, 2015

North Carolina The Smart Carolina?

The desire to go backwards is getting so demanding and so mainstream, at least in many parts of Trumpistan, it's a wonder that modern day Orson Welles hasn't made America piss its pants and insist it's not Isis threatening Amurca but the calendar and science itself with its crazy ideas about gravity and shit. Oh sorry, there is one. And his hair is perfect.

Down in some North Carolina (that's the smart Carolina) hamlet called Woodland (creative I must say) some of those hippies came in and tried to get a permit to put up a solar panel farm and provide electricity to the whole county and make the county all environmentally happy and probably high as a kite from all the solar panel 2nd hand solar fumes.

Solar farms? Huh? With all them solar panels and stuff that Saint Ronnie Reagan took off the White House roof when he was king and before he ascended into heaven? THOSE kind of solar panels? Migawd, what would the ghost of Reagan say?

Retired (thank gawd) science teacher Jean Mann stood trembling in front if the town council ,the best and the brightest of Woodland I am sure, and used he science teacher credentials to claim that solar energy causes cancer and dadgummit theres nuthin you can say to convince her otherwise. There's a high degree of cancer deaths in that county that Mrs.Mann blames on solar panels which are the obvious cause, and then she had to step outside for a smoke with the other cancer prone solar panel victims. Goldarnit, she taught science for 35 years and if you bring in solar panels, everything will turn brown cuz that photosynthesis deal will not kick in cu the solar panels are like a giant Hoover sucking the sun up so nobody else can get any sunlight. The town will be dark 24/7 I guess. It's North Carolina science. Undeniable cuz its science. Good science, not that pussy science that travels into space and says the earth is changing its climate and that humans evolved from monkeys and cures diseases. No, leave that hoax of libtard science to the libtards trying to destroy America.

Jean's husband, Bobby Mann, who completes the Mann Institute of Science faculty, got up and expressed his scientifically based fears that no business ,other than those commie solar panel freaks, will come to Woodland since all the sunlight is getting sucked up by the panels from hell. And if business doesn't come to Woodland, all the young people will leave and then what? No more high school football? Oh my, it's just a nightmare waiting to happen, thanks to those damned hippies and their solar energy scam.

By the way, the town council climbed under the desks and voted 3-1 to stop progress. Because that's America 2015. Where the dumb is celebrated and the smart is derided. Newly sworn in Councilman, Cecil Harkey (I am making none of this up) voted oh come onnnnnn people and no to the petition to stop solar panels. His recall is imminent I am sure.

Two things.

1) I wish I could tell you this county in North Carolina voted for McCain and Romney in overwhelming numbers. But I can't. Cuz it would be untrue. Obama won this town in 2008 and even bigger in 2012. The county is represented in Congress by a Democrat. The dumb has become so common it's even infiltrated us. See Anti-Vaxxers. We need help, the cancer (and not the solar panel kind) is spreading.

2) No Mr.Mann, the young people won't move cuz of the solar farms, they will move cuz of people like you. Unlike the 50 year residents of towns like this, they want change. They want to see the things they see on the cable TV and the internet. Hangin out at the diner and bitching about this and that doesn't cut it. Bye bye Woodland.

Solar energy does not cause cancer, unless you lay around in it all day so you can look cool. Solar energy cause independence from shithole parts of the world we just can't get away from. And it costs the Koch Brothers money. It costs BP and Exxon and the rest of these life sucking oil companies money. And it's rubes like the Mann's of Woodland North Carolina that empower these assholes.

What did Lenin say? Well it wasn't a phrase about "useful idiots" cuz he never said that. But nonetheless, being a useful idiot is worse than just being an idiot. Most idiots are useless. See Carly Fiorina rally. But useful idiots are dangerous. See Trump rally.

Sunday, December 13, 2015


Ok fine, I fell for it again.

Rocky V was so fucking horrible back in 1990 that it forever tarnished that vaunted series of popcorn boxing movies you couldn't avoid from 1976 onward. But then Sylvester Stallone, probably guilt ridden over the Rocky legacy, directed himself in 2006 in Rocky Balboa and put a nice finishing touch on the series. And he walked away with it intact again. Great.

If you are over 50 you remember the first Rocky on a big screen. Man, was that a movie! The music, the story, the guy, the background characters, the whole damn thing made you want to run out into the streets and shadow box until you realized how out of shape you were. Rocky won Oscar, Stallone was a star, and Bill Conte could write music that actually made you want to work out. Wow.

Then came Rocky 2 which had to be made. Stallone was now a muscle bound meathead. Lovable but still he had become his own real life self. Rocky 2 was ok, not great but ok. Then Rocky 3 came along. And it was better, much better than Rocky 2 because its villain was actually a villain, not the lovable Apollo Creed, but Mister T in all his glory. And they killed Mickey. Rocky 4 featured another great villain, a steroid pumped robot Russian who actually killed Apollo Creed.

Then came Rocky 5. Ugh!

But a fresh set of eyes in a 29 year old director named Ryan Coogler (Fruitvale Station) saw a series that needed to continue and the result is Creed. Thanks a lot, Ryan Coogler because this series is back and as good as ever.

Creed features two actors you cannot help but love, Michael B Jordan as Apollo Creed's insecure love child, and of course, Stallone as a broken down Rocky just living out his life until he can reunite in the after life with Adrian and Paulie.

The story is basically Rocky rebooted with Stallone playing the Burgess Meredith part (women weaken legs) and Jordan playing Rocky. Inexperienced, angry and looking to knock over the best fighter on earth, Creed moves up the ladder under a different name. Then when he beats a fighter of note, yep, its all over the media who he really is.

You can guess the rest. And it's thrilling. Updated and freshened up by Coogler, this series could go on for years if the players want it to. Some part of me hopes it does, yet some part of me worries about a Creed 5.

And now a bit about Stallone. He aint a great actor, lets face it. But at age 69, he knows who he is. He's Rocky Balboa. And dammit he is fantastic in this movie. He moves like a 69 year old ex fighter. He worries about his own mortality like a 69 year old man. He revels in his de facto son's success. He bleeds for Creed's failures. If Sylvester Stallone is not nominated for an Oscar for this movie, I will be shocked. And if he wins, I would be happy for him. He is that good.

Go see it. It's worth it.

Saturday, December 12, 2015

Celebrity FlimFlammer!

I swear I thought he'd be gone by now. He'd be hosting that mildly amusing reality show again, blaming the mainstream everything for his demise, being the martyr, saying how he would have won the presidency easy, all 50 states, going back to just being a dick to poor people.
But he's still here/. And he's fucking winning!

I don't care for Republican politics. It's selfish, mean spirited, tin eared, very white, and geared to protecting the powerful while conning the lessers with side dishes like religion and guns and abortion and other nonsensical bullshit the powers that be don't really give a shit about. But it was always that inner, hidden, quiet white supremacy wing that really bugged me. The ones that support the police and the military regardless of who they murder kill in the line of duty. The ones who decry "welfare" and "foreign aid" and "food stamps" while grabbing as much free shit as they can. The ones who want to lock em up and throw away the key on every dark skinned hoodie wearing mugshot they see on their local scary news while ignoring the thieves in suits and ties running the economy from the computer screens of Wall Street. One for you, 5 for me, one for you, five for me oh fuck you all 6 for me. Those people were always what 10%, 20% of Republican voters? They never got what they wanted. Their candidates could win Iowa and some dumbass gerrymandered congressional district somewhere in rural America. But they never actually had any power. The right wing talk radio would fuel them up and then, after they lost, they'd go back to what they do best. Bitching and moaning and kicking down the barn doors because then they don't have to do a damn thing.

But it was only what 20%, 25% ok maybe 30%.

Chrissakes I gave them too much credit. The Republicans that is. I had no idea these kooks were out there in such great numbers. These people who hear something from Uncle Bill who heard it from some guy at the tavern who heard it on TV. No I swear. It's true and goddamit nobody can convince me otherwise not even with your facts and video proof. Those are all doctored......No no Obama is a Muslim, he was born in Kenya I heard it on TV and saw it on the internet. You're all liars lah lah lah lah stop lying liberal media.

That reality TV star is winning. This guy, this straw haired Harold Hill, has no idea what he's doing. The ego maniacal rantings of a guy who took the task of running for President as a lark and a self promoting mission, suddenly has a big lead and like the dog who caught the car, he doesn't know what the fuck to do next. So he doubles down on everything. Lies about Muslims, more lies about Muslims, lies about Mexicans, lies about blacks, lies about women, lies about the gays. All designed to get him the fuck out of the race. But it doesn't work. The bigot factor, the racist factor, the factor that Max's Dad always believed was so minuscule it didn't matter is growing. WTF is going on?

The country elected a black guy in 2008 because well, the demographics were there, the other side had an old man and a crazy woman running and Obama was in the right place at the right time. And then he won again in 2012. Bigger. Again, the demographics were there and the other side ran a plutocrat and Eddie Munster.

And the country lost its fucking mind. The old white people threw a fucking temper tantrum in 2010 and because in off year elections the demographics revert back to America 1955 and sent these Tea Party whackdoodles into office where they went on and on about debt and their children and grandchildren's future when anybody with a room temperature IQ knew it was all about them. About their panicky thoughts that the blacks and the mexicans and the queers and the loudmouthed ladies were taking over. Their deep down racism and sexism and homophobia blew the tops off their heads. Now its game on.

The reality show guy is their man. He "tells it like it is". And the reality show guy just keeps telling it like it is. To them. The ones so goddamned ignorant and clueless, they believe whatever they hear on Rush or Levin or see on Fox News or read on Breitbart. And anybody who tells em different lies and covers up the "truth".

I used to believe very strongly in "Godwin's Law". Ya know, the one that says eventually any political argument will end up with a Nazi comparison and whoever throws the Hitler card out first loses? I believed that a Hitler or Nazi comparison was used to justify virtually every stupid fucking murderous war this nation embarks on. So I didn't use it.

But for gawdsakes, after watching the Yer Fired guy whip those South Carolina rednecks into a Islam hating frenzy and seeing a CNN panel of 29 Trump "supporters" say things about the sitting President like Fred Lanzillo, a 59 year old (sigh) Marine did:

"When you bend down to the Saudis, take your shoes off, put your hand on a Koran and then the Bible when you're sworn in?" He took his flag pin off. I'm a Marine and former deputy sheriff. He took that off, he was in the toilet to me. I would not only not piss on him if he was on fire—I'd throw gas on him."

I mean after 26 of the 29 raised their hands to believe a lie that Obama is actually a Muslim and nobody can tell em any different, what else is there to say?

Sieg He..........nah not ready quite yet.......

Monday, December 7, 2015

Fox Goes Dirty!

Holy smokes. What a racket. This country elected a black dude to the Presidency in 2008 and this nation went fucking bonkers. It's like when the shittiest President ever until 2000 Reagan opened the asylums back in the 80's and let the inmates out. There was no Fox News for the whack jobs to run to back then they they all became homeless and therefore white people don't have to care any longer. But now, holy tin foil, Batman, Fox News has em all. Come on in, spout off your bullshit and there's millions of dumb old white people who will tip a cosmopolitan to ya right before switching back to Castle.

Lt. Colonel Ralph Peters, who regularly goes on Fox and rolls his eyes and jabbers on about Obummer while maintaining his credibility by writing shitty war novels where real Americans kill everybody and let Gawd sort em out. Peters, who retired years ago and found himself lonely and bored and just itching to kill people again until those damn Democrats won and all that peace shit started. Peters, who never fired a gun at anything except his own foot, is one of those wonks who still thinks that Lenin will rise from his crypt and then he can be happy that the Cold War iso n again. Guys like Peters, The General Jack D Ripper of Fox News, like to holler and scream and talk like Bill O'Reilly wants to talk, appealing to the armchair tough guy who thinks bombing the shit out of everybody works.

Peters went overboard by calling the President of the United States a "total pussy" today on the Fox Business Channel, watched by dozens of cable viewers who can't get the remote to work. On that English creep Stuart Varney's show, Peters went nuts and even made that limey blowhard tell him to watch his mouth. Pussy is not an acceptable term on Fox. Commie, date rapist, and anything Trump says is pure gold, but pussy? Hey watch it, office sitting former policy guy who never did anything remotely dangerous, Colonel Peters. Or should I say, Colonel Dick, Colonel Schlong, Colonel Putz, Colonel Cock, I mean Colonel Klink. By the way Colonel Prick, you're dissssssssssmissed.

Earlier in the day some babe named Stacey Dash decided to turn Fox Monday into quite the potty mouth network of choice for all old loudmouths who think the elderly cussing is never not funny. Dash is an actress turned commentator? Yeah I have no idea either. But she decided to blurt out, I'm sure via cue cards, that the President didn't give a "shit" about terrorism. You know he doesn't care because all that drone killing and Osama killing is just a smoke screen for the real mission. To install ISIS into power so that Fox News viewers can achieve orgasmic pleasure by screeching "We told ya so" right before they pulled out the Jeanine Pirro love doll.

Dash, who cluttered up an appropriately named film called "Clueless" back in the 90's, found out very quickly after Obama's election that being a failed actress with the ability to read cue cards AND being half black could get her far by simply becoming one of the "good ones' that the Fox dinosaurs love to watch. Oh she's so purty, for one of them, and she makes sense being all up in Obama's face. See, we arent racists, we like that half colored girl a whole lot, as long as she doesn't move next door.

Yep, it's Dash and Peters. Cussing away, but good cussing cuz its against Nobummer on that there Fox Network.

Go back to writing books, Colonel Klink. And go back to making relevant movies like "Lap Dance" and "Lethal Eviction", Stacey Dash.

Saturday, December 5, 2015

Republican Voter Guide!

There are so many of these putz's running for the right to lose to Hillary it really is amazing the egomania involved here. And I'm not only talking about that one schlep who can't keep his mouth or his twitter shut, it's all of them. Seemingly convinced that they and they alone can save America from the damage done by the Kenyan Muslim Socialist Gay man with the transgender wife, this bunch of complete looooooooooozers continues on and makes me wonder, who in the fuck supports these assholes?

Bush voters--- thee are the establishment types. Hey it's his turn. Really? Ok I guess it is since the Bush's are apparently related to the royal family and Jeb! is next in line to further wreck the word. Like his daddy started and his brother finished. Bush voters are the kind of people who idolize GHW Bush cuz he's old and jumps out of planes and actually touched Saint Ronnie. And are still defending GW Bush cuz if you don't you have to admit Nobummer made things better and that's not an option. Bush voters are people who follow the rules to a tee and still call young people "hippies".

Carson voters-- these are the people who think they are smarter than your average Republican voter, not a high bar. They support the Crazy Doctor because he's a brain surgeon, he's black, and he has zero chance. This way, they can claim that after they tell some racist Obummer joke or forward Uncle Jerry's racist e mail, they can say heyyyy look at the n bumper of my Lexus, t has a Carson sticker. These people will eventually move on and looking at polls, have already done so.

Christie voters---- these are the folks who want a guy who tells it like it is, but isn't some reality show clown. They like Christie getting into bum fights with teachers and guys on a boardwalk because hey that's what they do. These people love Christie for being a tough guy and being a loud mouthed buffoon, like them. They just know he's Tony Soprano and will choke a guy like Putin to death in live TV and then say heyyyyyyy what'd I do heahhhhh?

Cruz voters-- these people are the scary ones. Just imagine they are all packing heat and just itching to shoot you. Unless of course they are at a Cruz rally where guns aren't allowed. George Zimmerman is their hero and they can't stand the fact that Nobama was born in a foreign country, never went to college and is a secret Mooslim agent groomed since 1961 by the Islamic brainwashers to take down 'Merica. The fact Cruz was born in Canada doesn't matter cuz Canada is white.

Fiorina voters-- Carly Fiorina ran a corporation, all bow to the corporation. The fact she ran it into the ground is irrelevant. This alone makes her more qualified than Hillary. She's a woman. She lies a lot. She IS Hillary, but she lies about good stuff, like Planned Parenthood. Fiorina voter used to go to private school, where a ruler carrying fascist dean used to come walking down the hall slamming the individualists around and patting little Carly on the head. Fiorina voter pretty much is a fascist longing to put their foot down on the creative weirdos.

Gilmore voters--- whoever Gilmore is, it's him

Graham voters-- Graham voters? Come on now. They will never come out of their closets to vote anyway so who cares?

Huckabee voters-- these snake handler idiots want to live in a theocracy where Jesus rules and funny old Mike Hucakabee makes wise cracks right before he pound the final nail into all the infidels hands. Mike Huckabee voters are Mike Huckabee before he lost weight. They are still fat, and especially between the ears, like he still is. Huckabee voters are the types who offer "thoughts and prayers" and are dumb enough to think thats all they have to do.

Jindal voters---even they hate his guts now

Kasich voters--shhhhhhh, this guy is the only one who could win. Not likely, but he could. Kasich voters know this. They know that Kasich is in reality a rock ribbed neanderthal but he covers it up well. He's the Republican stealth candidate, the one who talks about compassion and shit he really doesn't buy into, and Kasich voter does too. yeah they perceive themselves as all compassionate for the underprivileged,if they weren't all lazy bums and mooches that is. Kasich voter will end up being a Bush voter, fuck all those poor assholes.

Pataki voters-- these people need to just admit they will vote for Hillary.

Paul voters--generally young and stupid. Paul Ryan types. They have posters on their dorm walls of Ayn Rand and Ron Paul and think Rand Paul is like Ron and Ayn had a baby. 95% of them will eventually evolve into a typical right wing prick, which technically they've already done, but they like to smoke dope still.

Perry voter--oops, he's gone back to n*****head ranch. Y'all.

Rubio voter--these are the desperate types who know that the current front runner is a fucking nightmare and are busy seeking anything that could possibly even win 10 states. Rubio voters think his story is inspiring ,unlike that Obummer's story. Of course Rubio's "story" is 100% caca but who cares. Rubio voter is so hungry to support anybody other than that New York dick, they will jump on any bandwagon Fox News tell them to. Rubio voter also used to be Bush voter, Carson voter and Fiorina voter. And who knows, may become one again.

Santorum voter-- see Huckabee voter. Only just a bit smarter. Snake handling? No way. They stick to the body and blood myth.

Trump voter-- Wow, there is so much dumb to go aruond here it's hard to pinpoint. Trump voter is just plain stupid. They couldn't care less if their man makes fun of the disabled, kicks Hispanics around, tells black women to "do a routine", thrusts his crotch at them, calls them stupid, lies and refuses to take it back even after being proven wrong. Trump voters are bullies who see themselves up om that stage. Their bullying days are long behind them, but Trump makes them long for the day they beat up the homo, or kick the mexican in the ass or use the N bomb without fear of being called out on it. Fuck this diversity shit! America will be white great again under the Donald. Trump voter is also a big fan of Ted Nugent cuz going to a Trump rally is like going to a Nugent show, or a Nuremberg rally.

Once Trump is gone, and he will be either through his own volition or the Republican hierarchy fixing the game, who knows what Republican voter will be stuck with.

But it doesn't matter, Republican voter. The demographic isn't there any longer. You lost. America will never be white great again. And for Republican voter that is a win. They just love to piss and moan and have not a clue how to fix anything, other than Congressional elections.

Wednesday, December 2, 2015

Thoughts And Prayers! LOL!

Yeah when even the New York Daily News thinks these Republican pricks are wasting their time with their empty prayers and thoughts, they are.

Besides, either God hates their guts (which if he exists, he does) or they aren't really praying (which they aren't) and their only thoughts are of fund raising off the daily mass murder spree that is America 2015!

I'm going to go puke now.