Monday, October 31, 2016

MIster Lincoln, You Cannot Change Parties Now!

This is what a major political party of 150 years or so has been reduced to pandering to. A 51 year old man in Phoenix and another grown ass crazy person in Barstow.


8 more days! And then these kooks will go away........

Friday, October 28, 2016

Tom Hayden!

Tom Hayden died the other day. That made me sad.

Tom Hayden was an American hero. A man who had beliefs and wanted to change things. And fuck you, Mark Levin, he did it through the system many thought he wanted to bomb into oblivion.

An original member of the Chicago 8, Hayden was one of the men railroaded by a justice system that NOW acquits actual criminals for violent protests because of freedom. Hayden was a serious man, not an activist clown like Abbie Hoffman or a con artist like Jerry Rubin. Hayden was an original member of the anti war movement, not an opportunist looking to cash in later.

Tom Hayden is gone now. A man who mattered.

I will miss you.

Fundy For The Bundy!

Ok I get it now (actually I got it long ago).

I can watch a tape of a bunch of white numb skulls with a love for free government benefits for themselves but for no one else, carry guns (2nd amendment freedom!!) onto federal land (we pay for it dammit even tho none of us pay taxes cuz of freedom!!!!) and occupy it for weeks daring federal infidels to start some sort of confrontation so they can become martyrs to a cause nobody of normal intelligence gets. Whoa wait a minute. Meatheads with guns, brainwashed into a sort of religious fervor, occupying land and wanting to die for a cause no person with a room temp IQ believes in? It's the American ISIS. Idiots Stupid Idiots Stupid. Chrissakes, you got acquitted by the Oregon OJ jury Bundy Boys. Now what? Failures all. Losers. Damn, only dead LaVoy Finicum succeeded in becoming a martyr. Who? Said by everyone outside Trump America.

This bunch of deadbeat morons, charged with conspiracy against the government and possession of firearms on federal land, which of course anybody with two eyes and a working brain can watch tape of for hours and hours, was acquitted of both of the things that you can see. Right there. With your eyes.

Are they happy about this? I mean for people like these, attention whores and leeches, sitting in jail being popular among the dumb and getting free food and lodging cant be all bad. Now, after the acquittal, which made some cavemen lawyer so angry he got himself tazed, these idiots have to go back to whatever cave they live in and survive.

Look, you can be white, and do this, and get set free because a group of people too fucking stupid to get out of jury duty, and probably intimidated by some gun humping freak in the jury room, and get away with whatever you want. But if you are black, or Native American or a woman well then fuck you, get out of the way or you die.

These people are dangerous. They will not stop believing their freedom is being stomped on because of some slight that happened when they werent allowed to freeload off taxpayers and suck the life out of regular people. When Hillary wins, these creeps will be out of control.

So thanks Oregon OJ jury. Empowering these dumb fucks only causes them to buy into a belief that their cause is righteous. The same belief that bubble living Trump voters have that a "secret" vote will propel a groping, lying, con man who had lustful thoughts about his grown daughter into the White House because "everybody I know is voting for Trump".

Good luck America. We are going to need it.

Sunday, October 23, 2016

Why I Hate The Cubs!

The Chicago Cubs are going to the World Series. Now we have to hear about goats, and curses, and professional weirdo Bill Murray, and more curses and 1908 and 1945 and endless shots of old people in the stands for the next week or so. I am already sick of it and the Cubs havent even blown it yet.

Look, the first game I ever went to was at Wrigley Field in 1964 and the Giants beat the shit out of the Cubs that day. But it hooked me on baseball. It hooked me on the green field and the atmosphere and it even hooked me on Wrigley Field. Ah, you never forget your first love. It hooked me on Willie Mays, who hit a home run that day. I became a junkie. And the only teams I could pick up on the radio back home were the Minnesota Twins, The Kansas City A's and when the wind was blowing right, the St Louis Cardinals.

Now for some reason over the years, it has been assumed I am a Cubs fan. Well, I was a cable TV Cubs fan because it was baseball on my TV. Harry Carey was fun as hell. Drunk and uncensored, Harry once exclaimed after yet another Cubs loss on a Phillies walk off home run, "Jeeeeeeeeesus Christ its a home run!!!"

I would drive 24 hours to Arizona every spring to see spring training games, before it became just another money making scam by MLB. I would see the Cubs in Mesa, The Giants in Scottsdale, The A's in Phoenix., The Brewers in Chandler, the Mariners in Tempe, and een the Indians an hour away in Tuscon. It was fun, it was baseball. You could talk to the players, get autographs, get in the games for $3, and hide under the bleachers when your skin turned red from the 98 degree sun in March.

I would go every fall to Wrigley Field, after the Cubs were eliminated, and sit there in the front row with about 3,000 other people and see baseball.

And then came 1984. The Cubs won. The woodwork opened and out came the cute Cubbies fans. Making it a clusterfuck in Chicago for those of us who have claustrophobia, or agoraphobia, or just generally hate crowds of bandwagon jumping opportunists.

It was the beginning of my evolution from Cubs "fan" to Cubs "hater". When the Cubs blew a 2-0 lead in that 1984 NLCS to a fucking team from San Diego (??) and lost 3 in a row, I was kind of crushed. I wanted the Cubs to win. San Diego has a team? Christ they looked like McDonald's employees back then and they had that fucking Steve Garvey. But it was ok. I still like the Cubs.

1989 came and the Cubs played the Giants. The Giants won, of course, got swept by the A's in the Earthquake Series and I was finished with the Cubs. Why bother? I dont live there. They arent ever going to win, they put lights at Wrigley. Whats the big deal? It's just another sports franchise that makes a ton of money screwing the taxpayers and not caring if they win or lose because they have a ton of enabling fans who fork over money, win or lose.

Then came 2003. Another Cubs choke job. Caused by a super Cubs fan named Bartman who did whatever any fan would do with a baseball coming at you 20 feet above the field, he tried to catch it. The ultmate sin. Cuz we all know that the legendary Moises Alou would have caught it, the Cubs would have gone to Series and they would have won and put the curse to rest. Except for the Bartman character. He did it. He lost them the game. Oh not the 2 run error made by Alex Gonzalez, not Mark Prior's wild pitches, not the 8 runs the Marlins would score to turn a 3-0 deficit into an 8-3 lead. Oh not that. It was a nerdy fan down the left field line who lost them the game. No, not the next night when they blew yet another lead and lost. No not the fact Dusty Baker was your manager. Nope, it was the geek in left field, who had to be escorted out of the stadium and was spat on and called an asshole, and threatened by drunk Cubs fans and shown on the TV over and over and had to live in fear for the net few years.

Curses my ass. You just suck.

Then came 2008, when a billionaire family of right wing creeps bought the Cubbies. This family of greedy pricks then bought up all the rooftops, screwed the taxpayers of Illinois to "renovate" Wrigley Field and brought in Red Sox interloper Theo Epstein to "renovate" the Cubs.

The "renovation" is now complete. By bringing in players of uncertain character, like gunshot and beating women enthusiast Aroldis Chapman, the Cubs are the real deal. Just another great team full of mercenaries and whores.

And finally the evolution of Max's Dad was completed this last summer when at Wrigley for a Pearl Jam concert, it was discovered that the $500 million in taxpayer money was used by the right wing creepy family to put up giant scoreboards and and ads. That's it. The fucking 1912 bathroom still had troughs for the 2016 fan to piss their Old Style, no no thats gone too, only piss water Bud is sold there now, into. A trough? Really, how fun.

So in conclusion, from 1964 to now I have evolved into this.

1) I hate the Cubs fans for being superstitious bandwagon jumping assholes.

2) I hate the Cubs themselves for being owned by a right wing creep who decries big government except when he benefits from it

3) I hate Wrigley Field because you still have to piss in a trough

4) I hate Aroldis Chapman, a 103 mph throwing violent misogynist (unless of course he signs with the Giants)

........Go Cleveland! End your own futility streak. For the love of God! Save us from these pretentious Cubs fans.


Right here is a reason to not vote for Hillary Clinton. If this election wasn't so goddamned important to stop a madman and his brownshirts from taking over I am not so sure I would vote for the Wall Street hack warmongering future POTUS.

This is allegedly Hillary reacting to the Chicago Cubs winning the National League pennant and going to the World Series for the first time since before Donald J Trump, Bill Clinton or George W Bush were even born.

Hillary was born in Chicago. OK.....But then there is THIS.........A fucking Yankees fan? Really? If I wanted that type of miscreant in the White House I'd vote for this creep.

Man,this election sucks.

Thursday, October 20, 2016

Hello 911? A Nasty Woman Just Assaulted A Moron!

Donald Trump was outpointing his opponent last night as he had done in the previous two brawls, but then the inevitable happened. The real Donald Trump showed back up. And it happened because Donnie T is a sexist prick who is being beaten to a pulp by a broad.

Somewhere in the middle of the debate, after Trump had lasted far longer than in the previous two losses, it happened. Hillary Clinton threw out the bait. Donnie The Shark grabbed the hook because thats what Donnie does.

Hillary stated that The Donald, big talker that he is about building walls and calling an entire country of people "rapists" and murderers, had gone to Mexico and "choked". Oh boy, was that precious or what? Hillary dissed Trump's brains, his guts, and his manhood all in one word. And Donnie T lost it. His brain short circuited and the 1950's asshole that Trump is blasted forth. That dame had kicked him in his nuts and that cannot go unchallenged.

At that point three things defined Donald Trump as the child he is.

His inability to stop his admiration of strongman dictators like Putin and Assad came forth. Hillary baited him again. Calling him a "Puppet". Another slight at Trumps balls and his reaction was priceless. I know you are but what am I? The man is a fucking child.

His inability to concede. Though he pretty much conceded by cracking "good luck with that" at President Hillary, his unwillingness to state he will be gracious in his upcoming destruction was telling. The man is the proverbial child who loses and claims you cheated. You just want to slap him and send him to his golden room to listen to himself talk.

And finally. "What a nasty woman". Nasty as in she just fucking kicked your ass. Again. This bullying meathead has been sliced and diced by a woman so chill, she craps ice cubes. Donnie T is finished. He knows it. You know it. Hillary knows it. Everybody but the racists, sexists, and the chronically dumb know it.

So get that concession speech ready you fucking maniac. You have no idea what your brand is becoming to a vast majority of Americans. Your supporters would never stay at a Trump hotel, go to a Trump casino, or ride that escalator on your overpriced building.

Trump is toxic. Can you imagine running for office in two or four years? A picture of you with that joke of a man will destroy your chances.

So concede you goddamned lecherous creep. It's your only chance to redeem yourself.

And oh yeah. Nice choke job the last three debates!

Sunday, October 16, 2016

I Am No Longer Amused!

Was it here? Maybe it was here? Or here? No no it was here? Nah it was here?

There are so many moments in which I threw up my hands, went that's it, and blew Donald J Trump off as finished. But the monster created by a complicit media dying for ratings, a base of uneducated morons created 50 years ago, and a fear factor so great I'd rather eat hissing cockroaches than be around them continues to lumber forward and take down the entire country rather than just be a decent loser.

For months, no years, I've put up with this clown of a man, "firing" people on his fake reality show, bullying timid contestants who kept calling him "Mister Trump" as opposed to "Mister Asshole", letting him promote himself with failed runs at the presidency. Oh he's so cute, look at him. He's such an entertaining clown with that piss colored straw on his head and his blustery way of conducting himself.

But it was this week. This week. That I finally blew my stack at the fact, the fucking fact, that this joker is one step out of leader of the free world. And despite all his fuck ups and appalling behavior, 40% of this country still plans on voting for him and 15-20 states will actually give a majority of their votes to this horrible human being.

I am in awe. In awe of the stupidity of some who live here. The willingness of some to crawl out from under the rocks they reside under, and openly express their asshole-ness as "telling it like it is". Michelle Obama, a classy, decent and intelligent woman said it best when she said, "This is not how decent human beings behave". Right! It isnt how decent people behave.

This bunch of Trump supporters, and I know I sound like a broken record. have shaken me to my core also, FLOTUS. This gang of bigots and assholes and hateful creeps and misogynists and homophobes are now empowered by this horrible man. They are not going away. On November 9th, after this deplorable man has been thrown into the heap of loser history, they will still be here. Screaming and acting like bloviating monsters and threatening to shoot candidates, these nuts will still be hollering. And yes, most will crawl back under their rocks and seethe in silence with their talk radio and nutty websites, but many will not. It's those that scare me. That makes me fear for the life of Hillary Clinton.

The Secret Service had better be hiring, cuz if they think the racism of the last 8 years was bad, they aint seen nothing yet. Misogyny will be worse,and will be fully powered by self loathing women like these . You are your own worst enemies, ladies. Try to help a bit here.It'd be nice.

I have fucking had it. This is not funny to me any longer. I am sorry but I see humor in virtually everything. Much of it inappropriate perhaps, but if you dont laugh, you become one of these people. But this aint funny no more.

This horrible man, this angry ego maniacal crazy person has exposed a wound America doesnt need the rest of the world to see. The white supremacy ingrained in these Trump supporters is the problem. The almost genetic inability to walk in other people's shoes is the problem. The deep seeded denial of both of these is the problem. The deeply felt why dont all these people just act white is the problem.

Thanks, Donald J Trump, for taking us back 100 years into a past that was supposed to be shame inducing. But you, like your cult members, have no shame. Have no sense of decency. So I have had it with all of you.

It is not funny any longer, Jimmy Fallon. It is dead fucking serious.

Sunday, October 9, 2016

He Said What?

Well now that we know the line you cannot cross in politics is insulting white women, let us examine the lines you can cross and not suffer any consequences.

Look we know that Donnie T, the walking mouthy diarrhea virus, was never going to win this thing. His supporters are dumb, racist, sexist, homophobic paranoid and did I mention, dumb? It is a 40% ceiling that he has never crossed. And if he lasts thru November 8th, and thats not 100% guaranteed, it is going to be a crushing defeat that may cause the 70 year old creep to leap out of his golden Trump Tower.

How many times during the last year I have exclaimed to anybody close to me "How is this guy still around?"? The number is how ever many days it's been since Iowa crazy people doomed Ted Cruz to a life of cold calling to try and elect a braying jackass. So again, "how is this guy still around?" Just one one day white people temper tantrum away from the Presidency. That's how he is still around? And on November 8th, if non crazy voters figure oh well he's done and dont vote, this country turns into a wasteland of lies and blustering bullshit.

So if the line he finally crossed turns out to be insulting white women, so be it. The insulting Hispanics, blacks, the disabled, protesters, Hispanics, the disabled, Chinese, Germans, women, women women, women, Indians, journalists. his own voters, Hispanics Mark Cuban. women, Penn, Hispanics, and dogs line didnt seem enough to get his bigoted self hating supporters to say whoaaaaaaa and I have my doubts it means anything that he gets caught insulting white women either. But this clod has to be dealt with.

If we dont deal with this loud mouthed lout, more of him will surface. And next time, it may be a better spoken creep of a person who wants to jail gays, force women into uterine slavery, give a gun to every white guy out there, throw pot smokers into jail, make HIV positive humans subject themselves to electrical prods on their scrotums, or as it is known, gay conversion therapy, abolish the minimum wage, and suck the Koch brothers dicks that comes forward to dazzle the ignorant bigots.

And his name is Mike Pence.