Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Who Let The Dogs Out Didn't Work?

A new poll is out showing Mittens leads in only three demographic categories. Yeah they are predictable. White people prefer Mittens because he's well, white. Seniors prefer Mittens because he's well, white. And rich people prefer Mittens because he's well, white AND rich. But the funniest thing I've ever seen in a poll, and that's not a high standard, is that Mittens clocks in with a whopping 0% of the black vote. Now either the pollsters didn't actually poll anybody black, or Mittens Romney is THE whitest man ever in the history of white men. Didn't the pollsters at least drunk dial the Clarence Thomas household? Wow, zero percent! John McCain stumbled into at least 5 or 6&.

Cue the inevitable harrumphing from the Rush's and Charlie Krauthammers about how if Obama got zero percent of the white vote it would be a national outrage. Yeah, it would. But only because you Republican assholes rigged the voting machines again. With that latest Romney polling nightmare, I cannot believe he's still within 4% of Obama. For chrissakes, basic math should tell us that with 100% of the blahhhs, and 75 % of the "illegals", 40% of us ignorant white traitors, and 60% of the Vaginal Americans, Obama should be comfortable enough to start turning Air Force One into Soul Plane (not a documentary Mittens voters).

4 points only encourages the thievery that's coming. Why, secretaries of state all over America can suppress enough voters to get Mittens the win. The Republicans will not stop until they restore what the divinely inspired Founding Fathers wanted.You are an unpatriotic socialist Marxist European homo if you don't wish to restore this nation to its Godly purpose. That is, only let white male property owners vote. Republicans want this so bad they've taken to wearing tri corn hats and waving flags from 1774. Maybe next, in their quest to return to simpler and "better" times, they'll all get malaria or smallpox and just go the fuck away.

Oh yeah, Kevin Williamson has written an article on National Review in which he says really stupid things like:

"From an evolutionary point of view, Mitt Romney should get 100 percent of the female vote. All of it. He should get Michelle Obama’s vote. You can insert your own Mormon polygamy joke here, but the ladies do tend to flock to successful executives and entrepreneurs. Saleh al-Rajhi, billionaire banker, left behind 61 children when he cashed out last year. We don’t do harems here, of course, but Romney is exactly the kind of guy who in another time and place would have the option of maintaining one. He’s a boss."

Now I'm guessing that passes for conservative humor. But hey Kevin, you forgot about Romney's grandpappy. He left for Mexico just for that reason. To keep a harem. you know, Mormonism. Oh shhhhhh, we can't talk about that........Yet.

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