Thursday, March 24, 2016

Religious Freedumb!

They never give up. Nope, the so called religious folks who makeup much of rural America simply refuse to stop believing it's THEM who face discrimination. Poor babies, forced into underground churches to worship that vengeful God who loves them so much he stuck them in some backwards ass community cuz of that Obama. They cant even worship the invisible man in the sky that hates everybody but them and brings on bombings to show how much he loves them. They are so beat down and oppressed that Obama probably wants to patrol christian neighborhoods or some dumb idea like that. And those homos, oh those horrible homos, what with forcing their way into stores and living their lives out in the open and acting like regular people and all the while recruiting the rural kids into the beastly big cities where the politicians have an open mind and pass those pro-homo laws. It just has to be stopped, and neanderthal tea party bigots are just the people to stop it. Back in the closet you ghastly queers. The savior, our Lord Jesus Christ, demanded it. It's in the Bible!. As soon as I actually read it I'll tell ya where He said it. But He did. The pastor we give money to told us that, and everything else we wanna hear.

Now because angry white people are making a lot of noise because of a perception that 'Merica is being forced into the 21st century when many are kind of iffy of anything that happened since about 1964 or so. Oh yeah that belief and the fact Democrats tend to stay home in off year elections and let this angry bunch of noose carrying pricks run the show. So we get right wing politicians bent on restoring the legacy of America. White "Christian" people rule and gay people drool. Thus, we get North Carolina.

North Carolina ran a bill through their tobacco chewing shit kicker legislature that was a cro-magnon Trump or Cruz voters porno (that and two hot chicks on dat there computer). The bill, signed by some guy named Pat McCrory, a truly horrible man that tea party Republicans put into the Governors office .Now McCrory ins reality is nothing but a stooge for an even more horrible man named Art Pope, but for this creep to sign a bill rammed down everybody else's throat (they LOVE that analogy) is beyond the normal silent bigotry reserved for propahhhh folk. Goddamn, and I thought South Carolina was the dumb Carolina. North Carolina Republicans, you know those small government advocates who think a strong central government is Stalin like, have now given themselves the authority to tell big cities, full of homos and homo lovers, that they can't pass those Satan inspired anti-discrimination laws and raise minimum wage because some hairy sex offender guy will try and go into a ladies bathroom. These are truly stupid people.

But North Carolina isn't the only state trying this bullshit to turn back the clock. It's now called "Religious Freedom" and it allows you to practice your superstition in whatever way you wish as long as it's not Muslim or any of those other non christian monstrosities. Discriminate against the gays. check, It is your religious freedom. And that's about it. Yep, back to the good old days when Gary down the street was just a life long bachelor and we actually liked him.

Georgia is threatening this kind of bill. Governor Nathan Deal (R-Possumville) hasn't signed it yet cuz commies like Disney and the NFL have said whoaaaaa there big fella, sign that and no Super Bowl for you and no filming our movies in Georgia any longer. Deal is sitting on the bill currently praying to his non existent savior and counting how much money his state will lose if he signs it. Oh dear Jesus, what do I love more, you or money?

Oklahoma, a social experiment on just how stupid people can be, has tried 28 times or so to keep the gays in the closet. Led by a truly hateful person named Sally Kern (R-Hell), Oklahomo has passed bills targeting those damn men who go into ladies bathrooms all over the state and as soon as we find one we'll be sure and tell you about it. Oklahomo ( I know its juvenile but you have to fight juvenile with juvenile) has passed laws stating school counselors have to out the gay kids if they come to them to "talk", presumably about going into the ladies bathroom. Some closet case Republican in that red clay wasteland actually tried to outlaw all marriage just to keep a couple of guys from gettin hitched. Then I presume he went back to watching High Art cuz that Ally Sheedy is hot.

Missouri, another state with two cities on each end and then a wasteland of revival tents and snake handlers in the middle, is in the midst of passing bills aimed at the gays, preventing them from adopting children and thus molesting them or whatever these sick minded creeps think.

Virginia, South Dakota, Indiana, Kentucky (home of thrice married homo hater Kim Davis (R-Homely), hell even my state tried this shit (it failed because contrary to popular opinion we do have some fair minded folks mucking up the tea party legislation), Kansas, a state so morally and financially bankrupt it thinks the Koch Brothers are just a couple of philanthropists saving America from liberal elites like Dwight Eisenhower, Mississippi (gee what a shock), Arizona, Texas, Nevada, Michigan, basically any place with a bought and paid for moron running the show are passing these "religious freedom" laws legalizing bigotry against gays. Hell I'm surpised half these fucking states haven't tried to admit Uganda to the Union though there might be too many blacks for their taste.

Fuck these self righteous phonies. And when they get caught screwing their aides, or when they get caught trolling Grindr. or get caught in a bathroom, the mens I presume, or get caught leaving messages on sex lines, or get caught soliciting for male hookers, or get caught blowing some guy against his will, or get caught banging pages we an all laugh and chortle when we should be sending the prejudiced pricks back into their holes. Stop voting for these repressed freaks.

As the poet, Willie Nelson, once said "But the ones who brag loudest are the ones that are most likely queer."

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