Saturday, March 26, 2016

License Plate Blues!

No it's not a failed attempt at the audition for Lex Luthor in the now out Batman V Superman. That guy actually runs this state. A bored rich kid whose Daddy bought him a toy to play with. Unfortunately, the asshole is playing with us. And this is a sample of this prick's thinking. Oh yeah, it's Governor Pete Ricketts in case you give a shit unveiling his pride and joy. The brand new Nebraska license plate we will be forced to put on our tractors in 2017. This is what happens when a clueless plutocrat's kid gets to decide something.

Good lord, what the hell is that guy doing? Chris Hardwick, that guy who watches way too much Walking Dead, said it looked like a "muscular Quaker jerking off on a cupcake" and that is all she wrote. I'm sure our boy Governor is angry as hell, right after he looked up the words "Quaker" and "jerking off" which right after he found it said "oh yeah, that thing I did looking at Ronald Reagan's picture". Nobody puts Petey in the corner.

Yeah yeah I know, it's a fucking license plate. But the way this trust fund jack off unveiled it at a press conference you'd have thought he had just created the statue of David, without the penis of course. Guys like our Governor, who is just short of being as dumb and heartless as Snyder, Scott, Brownback, whoever is running Texas now, LePage, Pence, Walker,or that fucking douchebag in North Carolina, love this unveiling crap. He even had his paid monkeys who clapped when they saw it. Yeah, Pete, this is the thing we have to put on our cars for the next five years, driving around the country looking for fellow embarrassed Nebraskans with a guy whipping out his johnson to identify us.

Now our Governor has denied the poor Medicaid, paid for a petition to put the death penalty on the ballot after it was repealed, spent $56K of taxpayer money to illegally bring drugs into the country so he could kill people (by the eay, the drugs never got here and the broker kept the money), is paying to stop a gambling ballot initiative, jetted off to Chicago to get his knee replaced with Daddy at his side to hold his hand, spent more on security for himself than the last 5 Governors combined, refused to live in the Governor's mansion cuz his mansion in Omaha is bigger, vetoed a bill to give drivers licenses to children of illegals brought here when they were tiny little rapists (by the way it passed anyway and WE were the LAST state to allow this), and was made fun of not only by Chris Hardwick but by the brilliant John Oliver. Pete Ricketts is a freaking nightmare but because he had that R next to his name, he won. Big. So let's all enjoy the fruits of electing some dick with a billion dollars to run the state like a business. And that license plate featuring some hay bale lifting meathead with a 132 pound scrotum . Thanks, Pete.

We could have gone back to what was known as the I Can't Believe It's Not Butter plate we had in the early part of the century.

Colorful, birds flying north, sunset. People would look and go hey that's pretty gaudy but I like it.

Could have gone back to the blue and red plate. The one where the covered wagon is getting the hell out of here kind of like on our state quarter. Leave Nebraska, bitch.

I used to think the current one was bad. You know the one with the bird sitting on a flower. The one you see on the car that has stopped dead on your busiest interstate as he tries to figure out where he's going.

But due to Pete Ricketts folly we get stuck with the plate featuring the guy throwing tax money all the place willy nilly. And gawdammit, he aint changing it cuz it's already being made by our 168% full prison folk he wants to kill and they love it, it's terrific. Trust him.

This is what happens when you elect a billionaire to political office. He just buys what he wants. And his supporters all think the guy with the money is smarter than them. Or better yet, may share his fortune with them. Ha.

Shit, Guv, as long as you and your ilk want to take us back to the good old days, when the browns and the blacks and the yellows and the poofs and the vagina americans all knew their place wy not just unveil this one.

Oh no, it's black and yellow!

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