Saturday, November 2, 2013

Insane Clown Committee!

What a week, eh? Republicans all over the nation are popping boners and revising history as a anti-gubmint gun nut shoots up LA-X and removes another leech like government worker from the payroll. All those lobster eating, cell phone having, vehicle driving, TV watching, clothes buying, unneeded kid having food stamp crooks are gettin theres by having their food stamps reduced. And Republican House members get to lie and cheat and say stupid shit on a national platform about the worst scandal ever since Benghazi, the website problems of the Affordable Health Care Act. Millions have died, untold billions of dollars have been wasted and trillions of beads of flop sweat have been shed as Republicans fear the worst, that this Act could work and all those poors could live longer and maybe vote against them. Oh, the humanity!

The House Committee on Stupidity met this week to showcase their dumbest members. People like Joe Barton (Moron-Tx), Marsha Blackburn (Cretin-Tn), Dave Camp (Idiot-Mi), Fred Upton (Different Idiot-Mi), Cory Gardner (Secessionist-Co) and my own rep, Lee Terry (Waste of Air-Ne) all got to show anyone in the double digit IQ range how goddamned dumb they really are.

Cory Gardner, the secessionist from Colorado, didn't care for that ad pictured above for "Brobamacare" because college kids in his district all go to college to learn how to drive a tractor and praise Jesus like he did at Colorado State University. A school where a young Nebraskan died of alcohol poisoning a few years back because she let Satan in or something. And besides, Gardner is one of those 2010 dimwits who got elected by a bunch of Colorado bitters who will vote next week to secede from Colorado and try to become the 51st state. Good luck there, necks.

Joe Barton, one of numerous nitwits from Texas, also an aspiring Larry the Cable Guy, made Wizard of Oz jokes at Kathleen Sebelius because she's from Kansas, hahahahahaha, get it, cuz ya know, Oz was Kansas or sort of like Kansas and Dorothy said we're not in Kansas anymore to her dog and haha, uhhhh, yeah. Cut off the sleeves, Joe, and become Joe The Plumber. Oh that's already taken by some other brain dead?

Marsha Blackburn, kind of a more masculine Lindsay Graham (Closet Case-SC), took her turn to call for Americans rights to buy cheap shoes and Ford Pintos and drink out of red solo cups if they prefer. You know, just like their right to buy shitty insurance plans that pay only if the the still blows up and you get burned and then only $50 a day for as long as you are unconscious and not screaming in pain. She is a master of dumbing it down. And she doesn't even try.

Dave Camp, the chairman of this Insane Clown Posse of a committee, got his panties all in a wad because projections for enrollment are not as high as they should be. Well, Dave, isn't that a good thing for you? I don't get guys like this heartless prick from Michigan. This is the guy who not only wanted to cut taxes for Mitt Romney, but wanted to raise taxes on that pesky 47%. Come on kid, fork over some of that lunch money.

Fred Upton, another of the Michigan brain trust committee, tried to badger, or it wolverine, witnesses into bursting into tears or something until he was shut down by somebody from Jersey, Frank Pallone (D-NJ) (loved him singing by the trash can in Rocky by the way) who refused to yield to Upton's "monkey court". Yeah, Upton, put that in your Jersey dictionary and lump it.

And Lee Terry, my boy from Nebraska, who is living proof if you keep getting elected by small margins by retired Air Force double dippers and manage to stick around doing whatever you are told without question, yes you too can get assigned to "important" committees like Ways and Means. Terry, who asked the same question over and over about how many people signed up on the crashed website before harrumphing and telling Sebelius she obviously wasn't going to answer his scripted question. Then he came back here and went on friendly right wing talk shows (redundant I know) and harrumphed again and fed raw meat to the local yokel hosts by saying "perjury charges" were on the table for Sebelius. Yeah Lee, you're a fucking lawyer allegedly. Shut up and go back to voting both sides of every issue.

Meanwhile, the poors get poorer, shooters keep shooting, and Republicans keep getting dumber and dumber. All is well in Hillary-land.

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