Saturday, January 2, 2016

The Hateful Eight!

What can I say? Did I ever tell you I think Quentin Tarantino is one sick fuck? I mean the guy is a nutcase along the lines of Mel Gibson's fascination with torture porn fetish but with an unhealthy need to go even further and throw in a few n bombs (about 60 or so here) along the way. Good gawd! The Hateful Eight is one sick piece of bloody garbage. But that in itself doesn't make it unwatchable. Because in the 167 minutes of this post Civil War gorefest, Tarantino proves again he CAN write some of the best dialogue you've ever heard, and some of the most juvenile bullshit you haven't heard since you were in the playground in 7th grade with your dumbfuck buddies. Love/Hate? You are correct.


1)The Hateful Eight is beautifully shot. It would have made a great IMAX travelogue about the mountains. Phenomenal cinematography.

2) Samuel L Jackson - there is no way that anybody writes dialogue for this guy. They just turn on the camera and let this guy go. Sam, you're a bounty hunter, a former Union officer, and everybody hates you and calls you a n****r every 2 or 3 minutes. Go with it. And he does, motherfucker. He is great. Well, except when he has to recite Tarantino written dialogue about marching some naked dude through the snow and then making him, uhhhhhhh, well, it aint pretty and it aint even clever. It's just like a 14 year old wrote it.

2)Kurt Russell-- a combination of Yosemite Sam and well, Yosemite Sam. Russell throws out the insults though a gigantic mustache while chained up to a beaten to a pulp Jennifer Jason Leigh. Yeah, he's great. Except when he has to, oh hell, that's in the hate section.

4) Walton Goggins, Bruce Dern, Michael Madsen, Tim Roth, Demian Bichir (the guy from The Bridge), and even Jennifer Jason Leigh most of the time. They are all great actors, forced to spew Tarantino's words like hot and cold running shower water...........ahhhhhhhh nice and warm ...Holy shit who flushed the fucking toilet...........shit, its ice cold.....

5) The story. It's a like a giant Clue game. Who's the bad guy? Is it the butler in the library with the knife? Hey man, it's the Hateful Eight. Figure it out.


1) Jennifer Jason Leigh. Not her personally, but the way she's treated in this tribute to racist, misogynistic, Trump like behavior. She spews out the N bomb so many times, that every time Kurt Russell or whoever belts her in the mouth it seems that because she is such a racist C word, that justifies beating her face to a pulp. And the audience laughs. Ha, look her teeth is all gone now. I found it a bit disturbing.

2)The blood. Oh for fucks sake, come on. I know it's a cartoon, but Tarantino, who as I stated can write some of the best dialogue ever (see first 20 minutes of Inglorius Basterds), chooses to go over the top time and time again. And the audience laughs up a storm. Look his head came clean off....hahahahaha. Again, a bit disturbing. What exactly IS the budget for fake blood in Tarantino movies?

3) That scene with Sam Jackson and the naked guy in the snow. So over the top. Nobody is gonna buy that, other than a dumb Bruce Dern, who because he's a stupid racist too, gets what's coming to him. Ugh!

4) Jennifer Jason Leigh's pivotal scene. It's torture porn, it's woman hating, and it's a scene of lingering snuff film type film making that should bother anybody who watches it. It did me. But hey, she done mouthed off too much, right?

The Hateful Eight! If you can't stop yourself from seeing it for the really great parts of dialogue, go ahead, it's worth it I guess. But for the rest of it, the gore, the gore, the gore, the gore, the n bombs, the gore, the misogyny, the gore, the racism, the gore, the gore, it may a be a long endeavor.

And just one more thing. Working the n bomb into a story that takes place during slavery times (Django) is one thing, but this time, come on? Ok, fine Max's Dad, thats how people talked back then. They dropped the N word like crazy right to a N words face, even if he was holding a gun. Really? And you know this how? It gets old. Really old. Really fast. I don't need to be constantly reminded of who is the bad guy or gal because the are so fucking stupid to call Sam Jackson a n****r to his face. I fucking get it, QT. I do.

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