Monday, January 7, 2013

Win One For The Ripper!


Fuck Notre Dame! There I said it. So as to get any sense of fairness out of the way, let's just get it out there. I despise Notre Dame, I despise the myth of Notre Dame, and I despise Notre Dame because their aura of superiority is so damaged by facts it cannot possibly exist, except in the heads of Irish Catholic meatheads bound by superstition to deny reality.

In Catholic high school (yeah a lot of my issues go back to that time period) Notre Dame was the goddamned mandatory team to root for. No, not that public institution 50 miles down the road in the same state you reside in, that's just icky. And the people who go there are icky. Notre Dame was special. Notre Dame was as popular as the Irish Republican Army. No seriously, Notre Dame on Saturdays and the rest of the week was for cheering on bombers thousands of miles away.

So in 1973, Notre Dame was forced to play Nebraska in the Orange Bowl. Those of us peasants who rooted for good old state U against the professional Irishmen busy keeping up the dumb as box of potatoes stereotype. Johnny The Jet Rodgers took Notre Dame's head off and crapped down their whiskey soaked necks. 40-7. It was heaven for a day in high school.

Notre Dame is just another extension of the cover up artists running that religion they wear on their fucking sleeve what with that giant picture of Jesus looking down into that stadium.

Declan Sullivan probably wishes Touchdown Fucking Jesus would have been looking down on him when that screeching lunatic Brian Kelly ordered him to climb a tower to film another incompetent Irish football practice in 40 mile an hour winds. Nope, TD Jesus just stared into space as poor Mr.Sullivan was blown over and killed because their football coach is a overpaid sociopath.

Poor Lizzy Seeburg probably wishes Touchdown Jesus had been looking down on her instead of some slobbering Notre Dame rapist football player. Oh yeah, she's dead too. Killed herself. Something about depression, being raped, threatening texts "urging" her to not mess with Irish football, and the indifference of the Notre Dame campus police to investigate. Somewhere on that field tonight, that rapey Irish football player will be playing. If there IS a Touchdown Jesus, He'll make sure that Jack the Ripper creep shatters his knee.

Good Ol' Notre Dame, waking the echoes cheering her name. Well this is one Irish Catholic who wishes Satan himself would rise up and destroy that place.

I have no love for Alabama. Their coach, Nick Saban, is a liar and a cheat but hey, as far as I know, he is not responsible for the deaths of anything except Auburn trees and any semblance of intelligence in Alabama.

So for tonight. Roll Tide. Ugh, I just threw up in my mouth a little.

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