Sunday, May 18, 2014


I love the old horror movies. The Draculas, Frankensteins, Wolfmans, the 1992 Republican convention. But I never really got into the big guy, Godzilla, until Max became fascinated with the giant lizard as a youngster. Godzilla fighting evil like Mothra, Mechagodzilla, King Ghidora, Rodan, Gigan, Biollante, Louie Gohmert (Moron-Tx). Yep, it's some guy in a suit running around spitting radioactive fire with horribly dubbed English, kind of like Steve King (Idiot-Ia).

The new Godzilla movie started on Thursday. Max "forced" me to take him on Friday. To the $15 IMAX, 3D version, of course. You HAVE to see computer generated Godzilla in all his GIANT 3D form, right?

This 2014 Godzilla is an apology of sorts. To the Japanese. Sorry, Japan, for that horrific 1998 abortion of a Godzilla movie that took place in Madison Square Garden and was more destructive than the Knicks.

2014 Godzilla features Bryan Cranston as typical crazy conspiracy guy who sees a 1999 nuclear power plant accident as something far worse than led to believe. Cranston is right of course as in 2014 giant praying mantis's suddenly come to life eating anything radioactive like that 1998 Godzilla movie. And they head for the United States, along with our buddy, Godzilla.

(Spoiler Alert)--really?? In a Godzilla movie? If you really like Bryan Cranston and actually go to this movie to watch him instead of waiting for Godzilla to tear shit up, well save your money. Let's just say, Baby Blue plays very early for Bryan Cranston.

Godzilla swims across the Pacific to get those praying mantis's who have stopped off to screw up Hawaii just for practice. Meanwhile Cranston's son has become a believer and hitches a ride to help out. Cranston's son is played by a sort of Channing Tatum like actor who was much cheaper. Ah hell, who cares. Nobody cares about the plot, right?

It takes a while but eventually Godzilla and the Praying Mantis's (yeah I know they are called MUTOs) meet up in San Francisco, cuz who doesn't wanna see a well known city with well known landmarks get fucked up? Vegas, I'm talking to you too. Poor Caesar's Palace.

Godzilla and the MUTO's fight and fight and knock buildings over and I gotta say, it was spectacular to watch in 3D and on an IMAX screen. It really was. A scene of military paratroopers jumping from a plane into a black cloud of destruction that kicks off the end was also a well done scene. In 3D, you feel like you're jumping also.

Godzilla is not going to stay with you. It's not going to be a movie you watch over and over. But for about 2 hours, with your kid, and about 50 other Comic Book Guys its a great ride.

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