Sunday, February 22, 2015

American Sniper!

Sorry,'Merica. When Seth Rogen, hardly an intellectual giant, said that American Sniper was like the Nazi propaganda film in the third act of Inglorius Basterds, he was uhhhh right. The problem with Rogen is he used that dreaded word that makes you lose arguments immediately, Nazi. Don't say "Nazi". It pisses people off. You lose all credibility when you say something is just like "Nazis", unless of course you're a dumbass right wing nut and say that Obummer is the modern day equivalent of "Nazis". Than you are right on. Again, if you're really dumb.

American Sniper is a perfectly good film. Made by a perfectly good director. Starring perfectly good actors (except for that fake baby, whoaaa). If it was made about fictional characters (which you could argue it was) it would be Enemies At The Gate and get no Oscar nominations. It would be Fury.

Buy since it's about an American "hero", a dead "hero", its become as mandatory for you to see as The Passion of The Christ was years ago. You must go to this movie to have yer patriot card stamped. And you must love it. You must go to twitter and say you loved it. And if you are really stupid and angry you must seek out people who didn't fall to their knees in tears and tell them what pieces of shit they are. Cuz killin furriners is so Fuck Yeah America!

I didn't hate this movie like I hated The Passion of The Christ. That slasher film was a fucking monstrosity made by an anti-Semitic drunken sadist. American Sniper was made by a legendary Hollywood director who is so hit and miss anymore he probably needs to take another week or so to finish what he does. Cuz the fake baby...holy embarrassment, Clint.

This IS a propaganda film. Other than the "translator" character who speaks perfect English, every Iraqi, Syrian, whatever is a magic carpet riding bad guy. I can't even begin to tell you of the bad shot this is. However, if you're an angry white guy, or an angry white woman, or an angry self hater , or just plain angry that 1950's America is gone forever, you love this movie. Killin bad guys, baby. Dirty Harry goes global. Yeah!

Now I like killin bad guys in movies as much as anybody. Taken, John Wick, even Dirty Harry. Love it. But this aint fiction. This is supposedly true. If you're not that bright, or in denial, or just plain mad that there's a lot of those dark skinned folks running shit now, you love this movie. It's all true!! Chris Kyle was the best American ever! He killed 160 bad guys. Confirmed!

Uh no. It's not true. It's propaganda and it tells the story of a flawed man who was, quite frankly, full of shit and deeply troubled. I saw no difference. morally, between the Chris Kyle character and the Syrian sniper. Both are foreigners in a strange land sticking their noses into shit they don't need to be involved in. Period. The only problem here is the Syrian sniper isn't real. Kyle was. Sorry, but the American Sniper didn't shoot 7 miles away or whatever and blast the Mustafa made up guy thru the noggin. They made that up.

I really hate to get into that whole Iraq thing again, but it was truly the worst foreign policy lie ever. Yep, worse than LBJ, or Hearst, or Wilson, or any other American leader eager for the war profiteers to make some goddamned money and sacrifice the deluded Chris Kyles of the country for profits. And they fool people into believing the crap about God, country and family because it works. Fuck these war machine bastards.

Make a fictional movie about an American Sniper taking out the real bad guys. The warmongers. That I'd go see. That would be mandatory for me, not biblical slasher films and bullshit propaganda films justifying an immoral war.

Sorry about that. Rah fucking Rah.

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