Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Please Save Us From Ourselves, Ernie!

On the top of the Nebraska State Capitol building, a big tall phallic like building affectionately known as the Penis of the Plains, is a statue called The Sower. The Sower is spreading his seeds presumably in a way they use to do in the 1800's, otherwise known as ten years ago here in Nebraska.

Inside this building the body of nitwits known as the Nebraska Unicameral resides for either 60 days a year or 90 days a year, depending on odd or even years or just because they like to make even bigger morons of themselves every other year. Oh yeah, our wonderful Unicameral is so unique. 49 "Senators" introduce stupid bill after stupid bill without any fear that another legislative body will wise up and kill it. Nope, way back in the 1930's, known as 5 years ago here in Nebraska, my ancestors decided to save some money and go to a one house legislature. Voila! We are so unique, and cheap. Until a few years ago, these rubes made about $4800 a year and then got a huge raise to $12,000 a year. Well as they say "you get what you pay for". I wish we got $12,000 worth out of the whole lot of them.

This body of dopes consists of 36 Republicans (though "officially" non partisan) and 13 Democrats. So as you can see, combine that with a gutless, teabagger Republican Governor and you have GOP heaven. Years ago, the most hated man in Nebraska, a black man named Ernie Chambers, dominated this body of hicks. He knew procedures backwards and forwards, knew how to kill any bill, knew how to add amendments to stupid bills until it died from lack of time (once he added an amendment to a bill authorizing payment to an official "Unicameral chaplain" that would have paid the guy 30 pieces of silver). Senator Chambers so pissed off rural Nebraskans for 30 some years they passed a law limiting Senators to two terms just to get rid of him. Then he left (though he's threatening a return next year) and the clowns took over the circus.

This clown pictured above is State Senator Mark Christensen of Imperial, Nebraska(though what the manager from Major League is doing in the background is beyond me). Don't look on a map, you'd never find it but its way down in the southwestern corner near McCook, hometown of one Earl Benjamin Nelson, distinguished "Democratic" U.S.Senator from Nebraska. So you know there's something in the water down there.

Mark Christensen is our version of Michelle Bachmann. Or Steve King. This guy has introduced bills into the legislature to arm teachers and/or students, force candidates to prove their citizenship (yep he's a birther) and to prevent Nebraska judges from basing opinions on foreign law, his version of those anti-Sharia amendments dumb rednecks like to pass. I'm looking at you Oklahoma!

But now, State Senator Mark Christensen, an alleged "Christian", has copied South Dakota and rammed through a kill your abortion provider anget out of jail free bill. The "law",LB232, which would allow people to kill to protect unborn fetuses is just another version of that South Dakota nonsense that got shelved the other day. Christensen, of course, claims it's not intended to justify any murder of any abortion provider, but you know how many times this proposed "law" would have been used had it been in effect in the last, oh I don't know, 40 years? Zero. So you can see how important it is.

The deputy Omaha Police Chief testified against it. The Chairman of the Judiciary Committee said it would lead to "firefights" at clinics. Personally, if a pregnant woman needs to defend herself from an assault, and kills the attacker, isn't that self defense? Isn't that covered now? Christ, we have laws in this state that allow you to shoot a kid for walking across your lawn. Why is this needed?

Oh yeah, the Catholics want it. And the born agains. And of course, men who love to tell women what to do.

And guys who take the first six letters of their last name way too seriously. Right, Mark?

1 comment:

Jack Jodell said...

Thanks for that interesting insight into the nature of Nebraska state politics, Max's Dad. You poor guy---what a bunch of meatheads you are surrounded by!