How's Your Health,Senator?

The DADT got the old heave ho on Saturday, thanks to Nancy Pelosi, the Senate Democrats and a few honest Republicans in the Senate. This antiquated rule that you cannot be who you are and serve your nation was about 17 years too late in being shitcanned. Oh I know that in 1993, the cowards and the religiously insane still ruled the roost and this stupid policy was the best that could be achieved but in retrospect, it looks a lot like the Dred Scott decision. Good riddance.

You know let's look at the roster of dishonest panderers, delusional snake handlers and just plain bigots in the U.S. Senate who voted to keep this dumbass policy intact.

1) Lamar Alexander (R-Tn) age 70. You'd think being a former Secretary of Education he'd have learned something. But then again it was under Bush 41. So he's a dope.

2) John Barrasso (R-Wy) age 58. He's a sawbones but he's from Wyoming where Matthew Shephard was considered a suicide. Hes a dope.

3) Bob Bennett (R-Ut) age 77. He's obviously religiously insane. He got beat by a teabagger, is leaving the Senate, and didn't have the balls to do the right thing. He's a cowardly dope.

4)Kit Bond (R-Mo) age 71. He's blind in one eye. Not to mention morally blind. He's a half blind dope.

5) Sam Brownback (R-Ks) age 54. He may be only 54, but he's 84 inside his head. He's a nutty dope.

6) Saxby Chambliss (R-Ga) age 67. He likes to hire people who post "all faggots must die" on message boards. So he's just a sick fuck. And he's a dope.

7) Tom Coburn (R-Ok) age 62. Did you know Oklahoma is the only state with a dumber Senator than Tom Coburn? This nitwit wanted to censor Schindler's List because there were some naked Jews in it. Being murdered. He's a moronic dope.

8) Thad Cochran (R-Ms) age 73. Not really sure about this guy. He's moderate by wingnut terms but he is 73. And he's a dope.

9) Bob Corker (R-Tn) age 58.Should a guy named "Bob Corker" really be voting this way? He's one of those for sale politicians who changes his views depending on the wind direction. He's a cynical dope.

10) John Cornyn (R-Tx) age 58. He's from Texas and he's equated same sex marriage with some guy marrying a box turtle. C'mon John, Mitch McConnell IS a box turtle and he's married. Cornyn's a dope.

11) Mike Crapo (R-Id). age 59. He says it's pronounced "Cray-po" but I'm not so sure.He's a who IS he dope.

12) Jim DeMint (R-SC) age 59. This belly crawler openly says gays shouldn't be allowed to teach and either should women who let their knickers down. He's a retard.

13) Mike Enzi (R-Wy) age 66. One of those types who leaps over a dead body to take his job. Enzi won election after his predecessor died in office. He's a ghoulish dope.

14) Lindsay Graham (R-SC) age 55. This guy's deeper in the closet than a Chilean miner. Self loathing AND a coward. He's a tiny little dope.

15) Chuck Grassley (R-Ia) age 77. In a former life I actually interviewed this guy. He seemed like a nice man. Guess I was wrong. He's a sneaky dope.

16) Kay Bailey Hutchison (R-Tx) age 67. Big hair and all, she lacked the courage to do the right thing even though she's leaving the Senate. She's a texas sized dope.

17) Jim Inhofe (R-Ok) age 76. I'm surprised this guy hasn't sucked all the dumb out of the Senate by himself. Hes a fucking dope.

18) Johnny Isakson (R-Ga) age 66. Another wind changing soulless empty suit. He's a windmill looking dope.

19) Mike Johanns (R-Ne) age 60. He's such a dullard I can't even write anything bad about him. So perfect for Nebraska. He's a dishrag dope.

20) Jon Kyl (R-Az) age 68. He wants everybody to die in a nuclear war anyway so why the hell does he care if gay folks are in the military? He's a sunburned dope.

21) George Lemieux (R-Fl) age 41. He was chief of staff (hoo boy) to Florida Governor Charlie H Crist. So his vote makes no sense whatsoever. He's an enabling dope.

22) Richard Lugar (R-In) age 78. He seems a reasonable sort. Must have been the fact he's 78. He's an old dope.

23) John McCain (R-Az) age 74. Thank god this nut lost in '08. No man has destroyed his reputation more than this guy. He's a self flagellating dope.

24) Mitch McConnell (R-Ky) age 68. I'm not really sure how this mumbling turtle voted. He sounds like Foghorn Leghorn after a debilitating stroke. He's a down low dope.

25) Jim Risch (R-Id) age 67. He followed Larry Craig into the Senate. Not the first time I'm sure. He's a who the hell is he dope.

26) Pat Roberts (R-Ks) age 74. He's about two letters shy of being Pat Robertson. And about two IQ points shy of being an imbecile. He's a bald dope.

27) Jefferson Sessions (R-Al) age 64. This guy's middle name is actually "Beauregard". Jefferson Beauregard Sessions the Third, boy. This neck has an actual 0% voting record on gay rights from the Human Rights Watch. He's a hateful dope.

28) Richard Shelby (R-Al) age 76. Compared to Sessions, your average Alabama rube must think he's some kinda lib. He's not. He's a turncoat dope.

29) John Thune (R-SD) age 49. He's running for President. To keep the teabagging fossils in his sights he must vote this way. He's 49 going on 99. He's an opportunist dope.

30) David Vitter (R-La) age 49. If it was letting hookers into the military, well now that'd be right up Vitter's alley, so to speak. He's a diaper wearing dope.

31) Roger Wicker (R-Ms) age 59. He said the Democrats were "willing to spill innocent soldiers blood" to repeal DADT. I wonder how he felt about "innocent soldiers" when he voted to send them to Iraq? He's a hypocritical dope.

There you go. Those 31 jerkoffs are akin to the neanderthals who voted against Civil Right Acts years ago. What's the common theme? The average age of these old white men and one woman is 64. Most of them are on their way out. Their successors will be younger and won't give a shit about how someone was born. These cro-magnons can't get off my planet fast enough.