Now Arriving At Track Fraidy Cat, The Teabagger Express!

The first thing I noticed as I drove my evil 11 year old foreign car up to Lake Zorinksy for the Teabagger Express rally was how many teabaggers had evil foreign cars and how fliiping crowded it was. Bumper to bumper pickups and SUV's trying to find parking as the Omaha cops refused to let any more vehicles into the Lake Zorinsky parking area. Obviously the cops are closeted liberal Obamabots trying to keep the real Americans from getting together and having a tantrum. For being "taxed to death" by that illegal colored guy in the White House these folks sure drive nice, new trucks and gas guzzlers!

Parking my 11 year old rice guzzling vehicle on the grass, I start to walk to the teabagger rally when I forget I still have my Obama bumper sticker firmly in place just as a blood pressure rising reminder to the masses of pissed off white people here in Omaha. I hope the bumper survives. Yes, it actually crossed my mind.

As I get closer I hear the loud ranting of a woman screaming into an outdated P.A. system that I haven't heard since I saw Peter Frampton way back when he had hair. I can't make out what she's saying but the 1000 or so beefy folks with graying mustaches are loving it. There were a lot of men there, too. To the left, of course, are about 10 or so counter-protesters with homemade signs telling the teabaggers to go away, they're ignorant, and that Medicare and Medicaid actually help people. They are looked at with disdain by the teabaggers, anxious for some good old patriotic yellin and screamin'. I give the counter protestors a thumbs up and the shhhhhh motion as I am deep undercover here. They look at me with a puzzled look. I don't blame them.

Getting close to the stage I am not at all surpised to see our distinguished, do-nothing but what he's told by the Boner congressman, Lee Terry, pumping hands and pretending he doesn't think these people are idiots. Over there is a mini van with a Teresa somebody for Congress message written on the windows. I have no idea who this person is, but I learn she is the offical Teabagger candidate, running as a Republican of course because come on now, these pissed off caucasions are all Republicans, let's face it.

Dave Nabity, local hothead and losing Republican candidate for every office imaginable, is speaking about how "afraid" he is of Obama, and how Bush just didn't "scare" people like Obama does. Yeah, kinda like how way back when that Marty Luther King guy was awful scary and Barry Goldwater just made ya feel all warm inside. More teabagger speakers rant and rave about the same old shite we've heard for the last 60 years. You know, how the 1950's, when white men ruled and woman didnt work and blacks knew their place, and Mexicans lived in Mexico or California and didn't know where Nebraska was and Asians were from Asia and everything was just peachy? You know, those kind of speeches.

I walk through, hearing loud whoops and seeing some kook waving a Don't Tread On Me flag, when I come onto the sight that will make me nauseous enough to leave, not to mention I want to beat the traffic. A grown man, with his I assume wife and 10 year old daughter, holding a sign that states "Glenn Beck for President Sean Hannity for Vice President". The kid holds up a sign that says something about voting out "mean people" and the wife holding some sort of football themed sign because of course we here in Nebraska never ever stop thinking about our Cornhuskers, ever! So I wokr my way back out and head for the car, all the while thinking is this how lynch mobs work? Whip people into a frenzy with lies and they lose control and hang the black guy? Well, trust me, they aint no black people here and I'm as close to that as they can find, what with my pony tail and Claremont Graduate University t shirt. He must be an educated hippie. Git im!

No seriously now, they looked like perfectly nice people with some serious issues. Scared to death of becoming a minority in their own country as they perceive it. They holler and fall for the snake oil they're fed by Fox News and by Republican politicians. They are frightened that they don't have that built in advantage of being white anymore. They actually believe that minorities have more rights that they do. They actually believe in one world government conspiracy theories. They actually buy all of this stuff. Fear is a powerful weapon.

The one thing I ask all teabaggers is this. Do you actually see the irony in the fact as you rail against socialism and communism and taxes, you were holding you little temper tantrum at a PUBLIC PARK? You got there on PUBLIC ROADS? Traffic was kept in check by GOVERNMENT EMPLOYEES? Do you get that? I didn't think so.