Tuesday, June 17, 2014

Ole' Ole' Ole' Ole' Ole'!


Soccer is gay. Soccer is for pussies. Soccer is for terrorists. Yeah we've heard it all from the rough and tough American sports fan. Well, not so much any longer cuz hey man let's party!.

I like soccer. I admitted it years ago which is kind of admitting you like Abba, which I also admit. In fact I actually want to attend an Sporting Kansas City game. They look like they're having more fun than at your average Royals game.

Yesterday the United States soccer team defeated that powerhouse Ghana 2-1 much to the delight of clueless people who get all excited at the favorite barely beating an outmatched rival. Ha! Outmatched. Hardly. But again, give young Americans a chance to dress up like assholes and go all jingoistic and the'll take it ever time. We Killed Bin Laden! We Killed Bin Laden! We Are The Champions We Are The Champions!. Lacking self esteem is not an American trait. But just wait for the Germans to prick that red white and blue balloon.

And for those who cannot wait for the NFL cuz thats real football, take a look at Cliff Dempsey putting his nose back on his face after he got kicked in the grill by some foot wielding Ghanan. That oughta give ya a boner till Johnny Football takes the field and gets smooshed like the bug he is.

Oh Clint Dempsey. You have reached hockey player status. Move the nose back into position and go back out to play the game. Shit, hockey players bust legs and still play. There's no athletes as tough as hockey players. MMA or UFC doesnt count cuz those guys are psychotic maniacs who probably should be committed along with everybody watching.. But Dempsey has reached that status. And so has soccer.

Screw the NFL.

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