Thursday, February 13, 2014

All Who Want Taco Bell Raise Your Hand!


Now that Oklahoma has been pretty damn quiet in the last few days with no Republican hilljack introducing some bill to outlaw twerking by gay Muslims or something I can now sadly pick on my own state, and that flat one south of us.

Fremont, Nebraska lies about 30 miles northwest of Omaha and portrays itself as one of those sleepy burghs where people are friendly and would give you the shirt off their backs if you asked, in English of course. But in reality its just another hate filled scared little town of 26,000 that sees brown people talking all funny and immediately decides to ban them. Seems the browns all flock to a little place like Fremont because there's an abundance of shitty low paying jobs that nobody in Fremont wants. This creates a quandry for Fremont types. By the way, Fremont "types" are white people. Or at least 89% of them are. It's that pesky 11% that so bugs the shit out of the oppressed majority.

Back in 2010, when America surrendered itself to racists, sexists and bitters, Fremont decided to ban illegals, which to them meant anybody they thought might look comfortable listening to that shitty Mexican music that sounds just like the shitty polkas Fremont so loves. Hey, Jose, if you want to live here, you have to go get a $5 permit, then you have to pledge your allegiance by stating you aint no illegal, then we might let you rent some dump. Comprende'? The person who rents the dump to you, aka the slumlord, also has to get permits. It's free money for Fremont gubmint, which didn't really enforce the housing portion of the Ban The Mexicans Law of 2010.

Some of those touch feely liberal types thought mayyyyyyybe that the housing portion of the Ban The Browns Law went a bit far and that businesses may not consider relocating to Fremont and got enough signatures to get a repeal of that one portion of the law on the ballot. 57% of the good Fremont folk voted the Ban The Hispanics in 2010 and this new effort just pissed them off even more. Kind of like poking a Klansman thru his eyehole with a stick. Just made em hoppin mad. So 60% voted and said hey Maria, get the fuck out of Fremont and this time we mean it.

Yeah Fremont. We all know it aint about race. In fact you all welcome the melting pot that is America. That's what all the Ban The Hondurans Too Law advocates keep saying. What is it about illegal you dont understand? That's another biggie up there.

I believe them. I'm sure they welcome all people up in Fremont. Just like their namesake, John C Fremont did when he was whacking Mexicans back in 1846.

Now Kansas. What the fuck is up with you huckleberries? The Kansas House of Reprehensibles approved a law designed to "protect" religious liberty by stating that any bigot, errrrrr, believer can refuse to deal with the gays in any way, shape or delusion because it would violate their religious freedom to give the gays a quiche or bake them a cake or give em a drivers license or let em stay at your hotel cuz you know they'll just be a giant orgy all night long and they won't even invite you. You know, all that ramming their agenda down your throat stuff you all talk about all the fucking time. Repression anyone? Introduced by one Rep Charles Macheers d the bill passed by a 72-42 margin and now goes to the Kansas Senate, which I'm sure is full of more Politburo types who hate "discrimination" as much as Macheers does.

The bill says this, if you see two swishy guys or two rumbling dames walk into your establishment you can exclaim "In the name of Jesus, get out of my establishment you sinners" and you cannot be held accountable. At least by the state of Kansas that is. How that commie Jesus feels about it is your fucking problem.

Let's all hear it for the salt of the earth Midwest values! I've been putting up with morally superior Midwest values all of my life. Thank whomever, none of them have taken hold of me yet!

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