Would You Like French Fries With That?

France has gone socialist! The French 1% have all driven their Ferrari's to the Swiss border so they can be where all their money is anyway. Oh my Gawd! All of Western Europe will fall now that the French 99% have elected, what I presume to be, some Kenyan Marxist socialist foreigner who has been Manchurian Candidated by George Soros since he was born on Elba in 1962 and his birth announcement was faked and he was raised by a single Mom in Indonesia and ate dog and now the evil commie plan has taken over. Voila!

I used to hate France. Back before hating France was cool. You know, back before the Republicans started hating France and changing the name of French Fries and Bill O'Reilly would quote the "Paris Business Review" on how because fat Americans wouldn't go there anymore the entire republic was teetering on the brink of doom. Yeah, then I started liking the French. Their arrogance became endearing to me. And hey, If Tea Party Joe and O'Reilly had no intention of ever going there, that made it that much better for me. If, I could ever afford to go there and hang with Mittens Romney, the only Republican who still likes vacationing in France. My friends.

So before the socialist , Francois Hollande, begins beheading the right wingers, let's all see what happens when a socialist takes over a government in Europe. Well, the 1% pays more in taxes. Check. Wall Street gets clogged arteries worrying about that. Check. Ok, that's about it. That's hardly Hitler walking down the Champs D' Elysee.

So the new President of France will be some guy named Hollande, which will make Sarah Palin's head explode as she has already been so confused how you can call Holland The Netherlands and now the whole country has taken over France with their shootin' and ringin' bells and tellin' the British they can't take their gun.

Anyway, congratulations to the cheese eating surrender monkeys of France. It gives me hope that the Eiffel Tower will not become the AT&T Tower or the Louvre will not be sold to the estate of Thomas Kincaid or that L'Oreal and Renault won't be be shut down by Bain Capital.

Let the French be French. As they say to the rest of the world anyway, "vas te faire foutre".