Anybody Got Any Slim Whitman?

Oh jeez....listening to her is akin to jamming a railroad spike into your ear......ack ack ack....and the stupid women who listen to her and cheer while Hannity adds to his spank bank. Enough. I just liked this picture.

#LearnHowToRead!

The reaction to this waste of air who shot down, stabbed and ran down defenseless innocent people last weekend has run the gamut. Of course there's outrage as there should be. There's fascination by a complicit media to show this asshat's performance video so many times I'd have already said "NEXT" hundreds of times if this dickstick had been auditioning for the bad guy is a shitty movie.

But the reactions to #YesAllWomen, Ann Hornaday, and anybody else who deep down doesn't much care for the the uppity chicks is just baffling.

#YesAllWomen told a story. A story that most of us don't want to believe. That there are millions and millions of women out there who have been assaulted, raped, groped, stalked and creeped out by a lot of guys over the years. Lots of them don't say anything. They did over the weekend and some of the reactions showed why they don't say anything. #ThingsGirlsSayDuringSex anyone? Geniuses made that one I'm sure.

Ann Hornaday is a film critic for the Washington Post. That's a newspaper. You know one of those things your grandpa has sitting in his driveway? Oh never mind, it's like a twitter they put on paper and use more than 140 characters. Anway, Ann Hornaday wondered aloud if frat boy movies where fat guys "get chicks" and endless numbers of teenage males actually think that's true (along with the fantasy that all lesbians look like Kate Upton, hoo boy) may have been in the head of that privileged prick murderer. Goddamn, that set off Seth Rogan and Judd Apatow, who make a living making movies for the 14 year old mindset. Rogan went so far to interpret a perfectly legitimate question to hey, how dare you blame ME for some whackjob killing people? Chill out Seth. I've never really been able to figure you out. I've never really convinced myself if you are funny or not. Guess that's solved now. Lay off the dope and learn how to read. You too, Judd.

Hornaday had to take to video to "explain" what a rational thinker already knew. She was simply putting it out there. She wasn't blaming a schlub like Rogan, or a money machine like Apatow. It was a question. I'm sure Rogan's 2 million (really?) followers were all very nice to her also. Proving her point by being a asshole. Thanks dummies.

Hey look, this creep in his car. I'm not mentioning his name. This guy was a mentally ill time bomb. He went off. And he had guns. A killer combination.

Nothing will be done. Guys with guns will continue to flaunt their lack of compassion. Guys with guns are probably making You Tube videos now telling the rest of us who they plan to kill. Oh well.

Welcome to the greatest country ever.

Memorial Day!

My Dad often said the time he spent in the military was the worst 4 years of his life. I know it was, Dad, but thanks for your service in helping kick Hitler's ass.

That's my Dad on the right in Barnstorf, Germany sometime in 1945.

Happy Memorial Day.

Hey Mark Cuban, Why Are You Walking Down The Street Anyway?

Way to go, Mark Cuban, saying you'd cross the street if you saw a bunch of Trayvons walking towards you. Nope, the correct answer is you'd pull out your Glock and waste those motherfuckahs. Actually the correct answer is, hey Mark Cuban, what the fuck are you doing walking down the street anyway? Aint you a billionaire?

Yeah the age old debate. Are ya scared of the black youths? Would you walk across the street if ya saw the hoodied blcak youths walking at you? Actually in my case the answer is no and you can ask Max's Mom and Max about that walking tour of the south side of Chicago we took once because one inch on a map is a lot farther than it looks. And I'm too lazy. And I look homeless half the time anyway. And people are more inclined to cross the street when they see me coming, including black youths in hoodies.

But to regress, black youths in hoodies. Scary? Not really. White kids in hoodies scary? Not really. White youths in luxury cars scary? Goddamned right!

But really now. Mark Cuban was being honest on how a helluva lot of people feel. Prejudice is a result of what you "learn" as a youth. Or from watching Fox News or listening to a screeching Alaskan.

Now in the spirit of being honest like Mark. I will admit, if I saw a couple of certain black men walking towards me on the street, I would cross the street. Not because they might hurt me, but because I wouldn't want to listen to their buillshit. On the other hand one of them might hurt me.

Alan West and Doctor Ben Carson coming at you on the street, spitting on the homeless and spouting off nonsense that even Ted Cruz (Illegal-Canada) must go Huh? Yep, I walk to the other side. Cuz I'm a progressive racist who wants to keep the blacks on the Democrat plantation. And because both of them are batshit nuts.

Alan West was a teabagger Congressman elected in that temper tantrum of 2010 thrown by old white people who liked the idea of a black man who would collaborate in the destruction of a black President. West is crazy. Period. Booted from the Army for torturing an Iraqi policeman, going all Joe McCarthy and claiming there were 80 commies in Congress, saying the kidnapping of young Nigerian girls is an Obama "wag the dog" moment, and urging military generals to not follow the commander in chiefs orders.

But now, since the voters of Florida's 18th District sent him packing after one term of embarrassing them, or at least 50.4% of them, Alan West is doubling down. Becoming even more of a delusional asshole. He has questioned the loyalties of Tammy Duckworth (Tough-Il), sitting congresswoman from Illinois. Sitting because she had her legs blown off in Iraq when an RPG knocked her chopper out of the sky. Questioning her loyalty? Really?

So while Alan West was in Iraq beating hoodied Iraqi policemen and firing guns next to their head to get information he already had, Tammy Duckworth was co-piloting a BlackHawk helicopter in Iraq because that's the only assignment women were allowed to serve in combat in and got blown out of the sky, losing both legs and use of one arm. Loyalties? I think it's clear that Tammy Duckworth has real loyalties to America and Alan West has loyalties only to the first amendment which allows anybody to be a complete dickstick.

Doctor Ben Carson. He's a brain surgeon. So he's really smart. So to criticize him is all liberally racist. But being a liberal racist I can do that.

Ben Carson is Alan West who is Herman Cain who is Larry Elder. These are black folks who realized how much fuckin money they can make writing books hammering their own, calling their people lazy and shiftless, and making white people go seeeeeeee, when I say that I get called racist, but seeeeeee, those negro guys say it to so I'm not a racist you are!

Ben Carson, oh sorry, Doctor Ben Carson is a spouting fountain of misinformation. Whether he does this on purpose to sell books and get handjobs from Rush and Hannity I have no idea but nonetheless, Ben Carson says some pretyy whacko things.

Like the time the good doctor compared the gays to the bestiality people. Same thing. If ya let the gays marry then ya gotta let the animal molesters marry. Brilliant man, Doc!

Doc Carson also said that insuring the poor and those unable to buy health insurance was the worst thing to happen to America since slavery. Worse than Emmett Till, or Jim Crow, or MLK's murder, or Malcolm X's murder, or the Tuskegee Experiment? Really Doc?

But the latest from Doc Carson was his appearance on The View to vilify those damned welfare recipients. Egged on by meatheaded "actor" Terry Crews, Doc C told the View-ers how giving poor people food stamps and welfare robs them of any incentive to go get one of those minimum wage jobs that Carson and his ilk think should pay $0 an hour. Damned lazy poors. They just aren't all driven like he was when he was on the welfare and the food stamps??? Huh? Doctor Ben Carson was on the government dole just like those lazy ass deadbeats we have now? Yeah but wait, Doc Ben felt really bad about it. As he shoved a crab leg into his mouth he cried and cried and exclaimed "Oh nooooo, this free crab leg is making me want to register Republican"

Yep, Doc Ben Carson used to operate on people's brains. Too bad he didn't practice on his own and install a conscience.

So I admit again, Alan West and Doctor Ben Carson walking down the street (that's laughable), I do cross the street. Right, Mark Cuban?

Fire In The Hole!

Pro-Life Tennessee Governor Bill "The Union Slayer" Haslam has the answer to all those namby pamby pussies who get all queasy when a condemned prisoner takes 43 minutes to die from drugs that make it too fucking easy. Bring back that awesome electric chair that sets people on fire and that really clever folks call "Ol' Sparky".

Pharmaceutical companies don't want to give Tennessee those cool drugs that whack bad guys? Fine, Big Pharma. No politician ever got a vote by ranting about lethal injection. Now electric chairs, that is a vote getter. Now it's not as vote gettin good as feeding the bad guys to the lions like some Grapes of Wrath dimit ironically named "Christian" proposed down in Okie Land but its got fire, fire, fire.

Way to go, Governor Bill. Backwards backwards backwards. That's the Republican way. Perhaps you can also arm the Tennessee National Guard with catapults and perhaps allow state funding of some good old fashioned health care for the poor as long as it involves bleedings and lobotomies.

And enjoy all those lawsuits your state will recklessly spend tax money on cuz it's the right thing to do. Funny how Republicans portray themselves as the fiscally responsible adults in the game, yet spend endless amounts of tax money attempting to deny the gays and the Mexicans their rights. Spend endless amounts of tax money to deny minorities and the elderly their right to vote. Spend endless amounts of tax money to fund needless wars and needless weapons systems. And now, spend that tax money on their right to set bad guys on fire, fire fire.

Huh?

Good Gawd in Wherever. This Cliven Bundy wannabe actually said this on tape. By the way, douchenozzle, nice tank top.

I'm beginning to believe in drones.

Weddings And Funerals!

Hey it finally happened. Cam and Mitchell tied the knot on Modern Family. A gay wedding on a mainstream sitcom at 8pm Central on a network where kids from all over the Midwest can watch and be corrupted. It was fabulous! I used to watch the Tony Awards just so I could see the inevitable moment when two guys I never heard of in a play I never heard of smooched. Take that bigotry! Of course nobody of the bigotry persuasion would be caught dead watching the Tonys, instead they were probably watching two hot chicks slurping each other on the computer cuz that's normal.

Modern Family is a show that quite frankly I can take or leave. I don't really like that idiot Phil Dunphy or his shrew of a wife, Clare. I really don't care about their two stupid kids and the one genius kid who copies Lisa Simpson jokes from 1998 either. But Cam and Mitch. And Lilly. Those guys are gold. They are three characters on a network sitcom that stand so far above 95% of the other sitcom idiots (not you, Leslie Knope or you, Ron Swanson or you, Sue Heck or you, Brad Bottig or you,geeky little Goldberg kid). The fact is these are two guys and their little girl who you can honestly give a shit about.

The gay wedding aspect of the show, which went on and on and on and on, proves one thing beyond a shadow of a doubt. You homophobes are finished. Why? Because the wedding was so goddamned annoying by the end of it (not you Nathan Lane) that the fact it involved the gays didn't fucking matter. It was just as drawn out and tedious as any other television show wedding. Get on with it!!!

Congrats to the gays. Your fake weddings (and probably your real ones) are just as big of a chore to watch as everybody else's. Take that Middle America. Now you have twice as many pain in the ass weddings to endure on that there TV.

Hey wasn't Ann Romney supposed to do something on this thing? Yeah fat chance. Still licking her wounds flipping switches on the car elevators listening to Madame Butterfly I'm sure.

On the other extreme concerning the gay takeover of 'Merica what in the fuck is up with the Idaho State Veteran's Cemetery? Not letting poor old Navy veteran Madelynn Taylor to be buried next to her spouse, Jean Mixner, at that cemetery? Oh wait, they're what??? Married? But not really? Christ, Idaho, you're confusing me.

Ok, I sort of get it now. California weddings are not recognizable in Idaho? Legal weddings from California don't count in Idaho? Take it away, Idaho Gov'ner Butch Otter, yep that's his name.

"The veteran's cemetery rules require a valid marriage certificate in order for a spouse to be buried with a veteran."

Ok check. They have that. Go on, Butchie.

"Idaho's Constitution does not recognize same-sex marriage.

Idaho has a Constitution? Wow, I'll bet there's some good readin' in that thing. A state that elects a guy named "Butch Otter" has got to have a sense of humor. Ok, Governor Otter, proceed.

"The voters spoke in 2006 by passing an amendment to our Constitution defining marriage as between a man and a woman. I am defending their decision and the Idaho Constitution in federal court, so I'm not going to comment any further."

Oh I see now. You are licking the voters ass now. You should be proud.

Butch Otter, the aforementioned Governor of Idaho, is firmly on the side of denying a United States Navy Veteran her legal rights to be treated like ever other veteran. Like shit apparently.

Madellyn Taylor, a crusty old fighter, isn't going to stop fighting your wimpy ass, Butch. And judging from Butch's record, she is going to kick his ass. You see, Butch Otter sent from 1968 to 1973 defending the state of Idaho from commies in the Idaho National Guard. Hmmmm, what was it about 1968-1973 that would make Butch join the Guard? No idea.

Butch Otter, the old smooth dog he is, married the daughter of billionaires back in the 1960's and then one day, he met a former Miss Idaho 25 years his junior and the billionaire wife went bye bye. Well it was either that OR he finally figured out his wife's name was "Gay Simplot". Gay??? Ewwww!

Anyway, Butch Otter, Governor of a state so crazy that he, Otter, is considered sane, is going to lose. He will lose because right triumphs. Madelynn Taylor is right. Not far right. Just right.